Respect

Omega Bill · Post by **Omega Bill** » Thu Mar 06, 2008 4:56 pm

Negative feed and losses cant keep a prouder man down
I will be heard through ranks cuz I am louder than sound
And thats in it of itself, negativity isnt bad for my health
Its bad for yourself, hatin without reason homies need help
Rap isnt for a lot of people, some can easily find their place
Doesnt matter your gender, status, your origin or your race
But some people are too immature and bash dudes heritage
Not sure of their place in here, and I hope they're hearin this
Doesn't matter if ya eyes slant or if ya wear a towel on ya head
Thats senseless chatter for rants, hope ya stare at the foul on ya cred
It makes you look ignorant, guys a different race so you pick on dude
Be racist to someones face, stop playin lines, talkin bout a 14yr ol pubes
Gap in between lines bars look like picket fences, come to your senses
See through these lenses and man up to someone who's not defenseless
You're not relentless, you think hood and gangsta therefore you are
But dont let it go to ya head, no ones gonna be there for you "Star"
You shit on people, think its cool, and you try reppin cause you "nigga"
Till someone puts a hit on ya for talk cause they connections are bigga
Take things in stride when you walk, and criticism you cannot reject
Because your ego will stop, when you cant and will not get any respect

Trying something new with how I write so I can be a better writer. Feed it, please.

Omega Bill · Post by **Omega Bill** » Thu Mar 06, 2008 5:10 pm

Yeah, I'm trying to take in as much potential help as possible. I was too proud before to ask for help, but when ya wanna get better, gotta put the pride aside sometimes. So I probably will be hitting you up for advice every once in awhile.

Thanks for the feed.

Meta-the-DEMON · Post by **Meta-the-DEMON** » Thu Mar 06, 2008 5:24 pm

Yeah like dude said, your lines are much less stretched so props on that first and foremost... It made your flow like 100x more clear and lucid. Good job there. And also I see you using some multies too.. Major props on that... The secret about multies is that once you've mastered them.. everything else just comes naturally. Multies are my biggest strong suit and all it takes me to write a verse is pulling a multi that sounds dope outta my head and building lines around it. I mean, that method isn't for everyone and I'm not saying to force your multies to try to be complex... But just remember that imagery, punchlines, wordplay.. all that shit can be born from being good at multies. Just keep practicing and let that shit evolve and you'll be amazed. And also, great message too. So props on the elevation and the message.

Omega Bill · Post by **Omega Bill** » Thu Mar 06, 2008 5:57 pm

Thanks for the feed. It's much appreciated. Yeah, I'm better than I was, but I have a long way to go before I became a potent writer. I'll get there soon enough, can't rush something like this.

Thanks again.

Brah-Vo · Post by **Brah-Vo** » Thu Mar 06, 2008 5:59 pm

Yo Bill.
Props on this piece.

Bars are shorter, flow was smoother, multis were nice.
But like TGYH ssaid, u started strong, went down in the middle
but came back at the end.

Shit my fave piece from u my dude.

PROPS

Glamtrash · Post by **Glamtrash** » Thu Mar 06, 2008 6:00 pm

Positive message...Good to see for a change. The shorter writing style is definitely a lot easier to read. I actually read this one as opposed to just skimming through it. You're finding your style, and getting better.

Fav bit:
Negative feed and losses cant keep a prouder man down
I will be heard through ranks cuz I am louder than sound
And thats in it of itself, negativity isnt bad for my health
Its bad for yourself, hatin without reason homies need help

Kurse · Post by **Kurse** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 12:42 am

Like Dub said above me, very good message indeed.

The thing about you Bill, is you tend to drop better scripts than you do verses in ur battles.
It's strange really. haha
I mean, when you write these free-verses...you do pretty well. (though I have seen improvement as well)
But it's almost as if you can piece the words correctly in ur battles all the time, and it's a shame cuz ur a good writer.

This was more than a solid drop bruh. Keep writing and perfecting ur craft. I'm know the steriods distract you sometimes, but you'll do fine. haha
(just fuckin wit ya mayne)

Keep doin you man.

Omega Bill · Post by **Omega Bill** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:08 am

lol @ Kurse. Bastard, hahahaha.

Thanks for all the feed. Much appreciated.

-TraMaTiK- · Post by **-TraMaTiK-** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:24 am

seems like this wuz takin subliminal shots at someone,cud be wrong but it seems so,i wont say names cuz i dont wanna look like an ass if im wrong,but ur flow has gotten better now that u started usin shorter bars insteada them long ass bars,ur tryna use multies now which iz good,notta bad drop at all,keep droppin man

Haz · Post by **Haz** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 7:31 am

Yeah Da Subliminals Wus 2 Me
LMAO

-TraMaTiK- · Post by **-TraMaTiK-** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 8:01 am

lol 4 real?

Omega Bill · Post by **Omega Bill** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:45 am

Yeah, me and Haz throw jabs at eachother. It's never anything near beef or serious though. It was about his whole diss on a 14 year old, haha.

Thanks for the feed, it's appreciated.

~Symbolikull~ · Post by **~Symbolikull~** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 11:51 am

definitely picked the flow up here, it fell off a bit in the middle but it started strong and ended strong homie.. mos def see some elevation in this shit, the structure was pretty much on point, youve shortened your lines so its not a story within each bar now, made sense and you wrote a nice message as well.. overall my fav piece and your best in my eyes..

id give this a high 7.8/10

vocab and multies still need some tweekin

Haz · Post by **Haz** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 12:06 pm

Gap in between lines bars look like picket fences, come to your senses
See through these lenses and man up to someone who's not defenseless
You're not relentless, you think hood and gangsta therefore you are
But dont let it go to ya head, no ones gonna be there for you "Star"
You shit on people, think its cool, and you try reppin cause you "nigga"
Till someone puts a hit on ya for talk cause they connections are bigga

^ Liked T hat Lil Section The Most

you got The Concept Down of Dissin Me, few Funny lines Here & Dere
Flow Was Good like Dese Otha people Sed Ur showin Elevation
Sooo Chopp Chopp Wid Da Next Diss Hazard Piece u Bastard
lol

Stay Up & Stay Active

Omega Bill · Post by **Omega Bill** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 12:45 pm

lol, aight Haz, I'll get right on it.

Thanks for all the feed. Gettin a 7.8 does mean something to me, my other drops I know would have gotten a lesser number, but that 7.8 is gonna stick in my head for now and it's only gonna make me wanna keep gettin better.

Thanks for the feed.

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