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-TraMaTiK-
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Joined: Fri Oct 13, 2006 7:59 am
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newest thing

Post by -TraMaTiK- »

usin this for an upcomin song. feed?

see they all think they kno me when they really dont
i take it to the limit when u think i really wont
page after page every thought breaks my spine
turn the hour glass over justa take my time
id tell u how i feel but thatd be pretty dumb of me
what the fuck do u care what u done for me?
look me in the eye an lie as u live it up
ill close the books and act like i didnt give a fuck
call me krazy but trust me i knew better then
yall inject me with bullshit this is my medicine
yall aint hearin me actin like u impaired now
lemme getta fair round see how much i care now
i play my defense u can see my heart is movin
knownin every chart is ruined everytime i spark a new one
playin the game walkin in the dark im cruisin
dont let the smile fool u im more smart then stupid
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JayeTruth
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Re: newest thing

Post by JayeTruth »

eh... the rhyming schematics is kind of basic--just rhyming the last word on each line--played.

don't diss yaself--you did it twice--to a degree.

spit fire--get higher--don't even stress
fist up, guns drawns, ready to see ya cats bleed--
death is an escape--and the truth will set ya free
venomous flows ready--steadily deadening my foes
this mic is my bitch--and it's steady as she goes

...the Truth is Out
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complexity
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Location: Maine
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Re: newest thing

Post by complexity »

-TraMaTiK- wrote:usin this for an upcomin song. feed?

see they all think they kno me when they really dont
i take it to the limit when u think i really wont
page after page every thought breaks my spine
turn the hour glass over justa take my time
id tell u how i feel but thatd be pretty dumb of me
what the fuck do u care what u done for me?
look me in the eye an lie as u live it up
ill close the books and act like i didnt give a fuck
call me krazy but trust me i knew better then
yall inject me with bullshit this is my medicine
yall aint hearin me actin like u impaired now
lemme getta fair round see how much i care now
i play my defense u can see my heart is movin
knownin every chart is ruined everytime i spark a new one
playin the game walkin in the dark im cruisin
dont let the smile fool u im more smart then stupid
I think you really picked it up at the end. Tramatik's writing style is quite blunt and emotional Jaye. I agree, that he could work on his inner rhyme schemes a bit more, but content wise, I have no problem with this drop.
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