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Almost getting caught...share your stories and have a laugh

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Yomommaspimp
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Almost getting caught...share your stories and have a laugh

Post by Yomommaspimp »

alright so this was when i was hmmm 17 i went over at the time a gf's crib right? it was like 10 pm at night. Now keep in mind that her dad's a cop and he has weapons stashed all over the crib, prior Vietnam war vet, has this huge ass fuckin ROTT.

well I call her she sneaks me through the back door...we sit on the couch and start makin out n shit. I gets down to the having her in her birthday suit...her bro starts screaming her name from upstairs and i'm like damn wtf with a boner pokin out my boxers...

so i hear him walking down towards the basement and im like fuck! so i throw my shoes, phone, keys and clothes into her dads office and I throw a blanket over to her ass and i dart towards her pop's office (he keeps all his cop shit) to hide in the shadows (cause imma fuckin ninja) so he comes down there looks around and she's completely naked underneath that sheet.

He's like "What are you doing down here so late" She's like waiting for my clothes to finish washing"...I stare at my phone and i hope it doesnt go off ringing n shit...he starts walking around the basement and he comes near the office and im like whispering omg imma have to choke this nigga out....so there i am boner in all ready to put this nigga to sleep and make my escape...


He comes close and he turns around..."I'll be upstairs if you need me"...
she's like "Ok" sooo i dart out again and yes i'm a fuckin beast i start railing her and all that good stuff... hahaha we fuck around...and throw on her dad's cop hat xD!!! and start railing her...yes i know...i'ma sick sick man...ask me if i care...because i don't...

So after all that yo...we sneak our asses up stairs to her room...man i don't know what the fuck was going through my mind...all i can remember was "Pussy" i entered her room and she's like "we can't make to much noise" and im like what? this is my first time upstairs in her room...she was like "the only thing separating rooms is this thin ass dry wall"...

i was like =| "where's your mom, your pops and your bro"....she was like "my moms and pops is the rooom right next to ours" im like =O!!! "and my bros room is right down the hall".....=O!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was like what! fuck no! We're goanna get in trouble...she was like not if we're quiet...



(this is for educational purposes) I will explain what fishing is...
Fishing is when your in bed with a female you got a stiffy or a semi stiffy...
you roll over poke ol girl in the leg multiple times (like moving your fishing line in water)
and if she grabs it (bites) that's signal to reel that ass in and bang her... now to continue the story....


(STory Continued) So we get up on her bed right lol...and im laying there like fuck should i do it...and she's staring at me and im like fuck it imma fish for it... so she snags on the line and i start going all out on her having sizzures n shit(xD)...So we pass out...i wake up its like 5 am...her pops goes to work at 0520...so i here these large as steps around the crib...im awake like =| where the fuck am i...but i see this huge ass titties in my face...and i'm like yeah gangsta...

Man her pops ends up knocking on her door... and im like =O!!! fuck no! this nigga got a pistol n shit....and shes like =| "holy shit what are we goanna do"...and im like "I'll tell you what imma do im swat rappel my ass out your room (TOp floor of the house) with your damn sheets...or imma kick your dad in the face and run and hope i don't get hit with bullets...

She had this brilliant fuckin idea that i should hide underneath all her stuffed animals xD!! my dumbass dives into them and they were on her bed against the wall... it was a pretty big bed...i had this huge space between the bed and the wall....im ass naked still right...so she opens the door and i swear to jeebus yo....my heart never beat so damn hard in my life...I sunk in the space between the bed and the wall my ass cheeks were facing him covered by a big brown bear...ima coffee colored ese so im camo'd with the bears n shit and i got hairy butt cheeks so i pretty much blended in...

He sits downs on THE BED!!! YO! leans back...and starts talking to her...im like =| "omg im goanna die"...all im saying to myself is "Be one with the wall"
which was white i might add xD!! he leans back more and his fingers are poking my ass cheeks...thank god he couldnt tell the difference... you know a teddy bear fuzzy from ass cheek fuzzy.... so i'm all like =O!!!! and he's like "baby i love you take her hun" he leaves n shit and i jump straight up scared out of my mind..."FUck this shit, i'm leaving right fuckin now dude"

she's like "you Can't not yet, my mom still has to leave, my brother might not be going to work so im going to have to sneak you out"...and im like fuck!!...she has this bright fuckin idea to call her dad upstairs again and what not...and im like "what the fuck are you serious, you want me to die" i jump back into the bears like spiderman without his fuckin mask on n shit...they talk... he dips...we fuck...i leave...end of story...hope you had a good laugh...Share you stories yo! and yes this was real...
Last edited by Yomommaspimp on Tue Feb 10, 2009 3:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Cee4 »

blah blah blah


put two in the pink then put it in the stink!
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Post by Cee4 »

worst sex blog ever
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Post by Cee4 »

i`ll cyber rape u and leave no prints
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Yomommaspimp
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Post by Yomommaspimp »

hahaha nigga its's not a sex blog...im not trying to make you jizz your pants im tryin to make you laugh xD!! cyber rape me??? woah...what the fuck is a "cyber rape"...what are you a WOW player or some shit...Cyber rape...wtf...
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Post by Cee4 »

i aint a playa i just fuck a lot
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Post by Haz »

Lmao
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