Hip Hop Forum

stay hungry is the motto and never forget that i stay humble movin forward so theres never a set back, some cats just wanna be coo' or wanna be liked but in all they just wanna Be's cause they all wanna be with the hype, tormented and distracted by the money and fame forgetting the home where they came or why they were given the name everyone changes but these dummies are always born the same, Bones is tru the marrow there isn't one in the same, this isn't a game its the future there's destiny in one of these lanes, heart pump-in fire cause my hunger has grown solid step-pin on the obvious without the courtesy of apologin, and if there isn't anyone feel-in this then i outta start a riot then, starting with the government cause the system is mishandled better yet handle by lots and only seen of one, and he is a pawn young Pinocchio you can see the strings undone but you forgotten hes controlled through the wire of the spoken tongue, "off the head flo'etry" see this can be done treat it like gunfire within the gun, you load it up.. cock it? and point it right at the sun cause there's really no limitations after your done, you see my mind is more like a Gatling gun such a viscous one no need for reload-in because I have just begun to spun, thoughts turn realistic so i mantel thum...

This shit is good, although I do agree with some of the comments, it seems simple for me. I like the idea you used, but for me its displayed a little simple. Try adding more complexity and more skill. But this is really good considering the fact that it was freestyled, it came off the dome so its not bad. One thing I would say though is structure it, cuz it is hard to catch the flow of it. But all in all its not bad, but theres certainly room for improvement

of course...