Welcome to Illest Lyrics forum established in 2005.
----
Free Vapes

Vocaboholic

Drop your written rhymes in one of the largest collections of original rhymes on the internet. The feedback in our Written Rhymes section will simply amaze you.

Moderators: Loon E Lou, Enlightend

Post Reply
User avatar
Def-init
Elite Freestyler
Offline
Posts: 274
Joined: Wed Oct 08, 2008 9:48 am
Wins: 3
Losses: 3
Location: Toronto

Vocaboholic

Post by Def-init »

This one is for you precise. Enjoy.


Life started in a circle with a pentagram in the middle
Moms face was fertilized as she gave birth to me in a brothel.
Now I live in a castle alongside the herbal
Cause I was crowned the 'grammatical cannibal'
Can't shed tears! So a stand I make!
Shiver...when sounds of bag pipes skim the landscape
I walk alone, the desperado in my flow preaching a cipher
Expanding circular from my point of origin.
The beacon pinpoint's death's ripples from my location
Thoughts that architect the foundation for the next generation
I anchor my cravings in rhymes cause I suck at painting
So abundant they shatter my surroundings and prevent me....
From pissing on a burning orphan unless you paid me
A classic epidemic of Schizophrenic Conversations turned angry
The subject...raping a diabetic with Christmas cane candy
I'm hooded-evil, so evil even Hades can't stand the sight of me
I'm lethal when I besiege you like Julius Caesar
A simple life? Fantasy...The only thing I learned in elementary
Was to extensively end a fight in fatality
Like smashing mother fuckers into the ground and Callin it gravity
I thought it was a good idea to drive feeling tipsy
Now the visual is crimson holes flowing from my hockey jersey
The chronic condition of drinking has never been told so graphically
The black market buys and sells human organs
Old-fashioned fascism and anatomic Capitalism
I'm just trying to "Let a nigga know" like Saigon
That letting by-gones be by-gones won't stop the crimes
Cause when the slugs fly and the rivers dry
Your soul is the first thing going bye!!

A Symphony of Destruction erupts
When the abrupt proclamation promised is the prophecy of police brutality
I amplified my appearance and caused jealousy
When I Realized I could victimize on a rhyme scheme.
Melt down scythes into triple beams
My style becomes an opiate derivative
Every time I see a thug acting massively sensitive
Everywhere I go I sense it. On the contrary...
Or maybe it's contemporary cause I feel it too...
Who says they can be me? Cause apples don't fall from my tree
Masquerading in illusion, I'm malevolent about male violence
Grotesque injustice festers in a cave containing anguish
The situation is aggravation when the allegation's and speculation
Of segregation through god's eternal court of litigation
Leads to trepidation for all of creation!
My legions tire of the charade so here's our movement
Tear down the establishment and its media puppet
Run the gauntlet, fuck the stigma, suffer the trauma
Battle the hydra; drag it from the shoreline into the magma
The light burns, blinds and taunts me
Until the door opens from the turned key
And in creeps the darkness that allows me to see...
I rise up; I see my dirt stained knees.
The light did this to me, but the shadows free me,
The light no longer binds me, I eclipse the landscape,
I pilot the flagship leading warships filled with conscripts
Right to the gates and educate god on the true meaning on purgatory
That's the first story, the genesis in the black book containing hymns of sodomy


Link: http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/msn-c ... html#92828
Last edited by Def-init on Mon Oct 20, 2008 9:38 am, edited 5 times in total.
- If I can't bend Heaven, I shall move Hell. -
User avatar
- Mutual -
Supreme Lyricist
Offline
Posts: 4442
Joined: Wed Apr 09, 2008 2:01 am
Wins: 5
Losses: 11
Location: Dont Live In One

Post by - Mutual - »

man this was fire brought the vocab the flow i couldnt get as easy but this was dope i was really feelin n lovin this stuff

When the abrupt proclamation promised is the prophecy of police brutality
I amplified my appearance and caused jealousy
When I Realized I could victimize on a rhyme scheme.
Melt down scythes into triple beams
My style becomes an opiate derivative
Every time I see a thug acting massively sensitive

^this was the upmost of the whole thing for me it had heart i'm not sayin the rest didnt just this stuck out to me man keep bringin ya flow keep'em comin
The Eagerness Is Putrid My Fluids Acid Leaves You Vexed Like Black Holes
Your Inept To Correct Stretched Like Fat Folds Perplexed Like Castro
I'm So Tenacious With Rhymes Sensatious So Patient With Lines
While You Fill Your Writtens With Filler And So Stay Vacant In Mind
I'm Amiable But Too Your Haters I Appease Your Arcane Admissions
Dark Games No Vision Your Avarice Lead To Scarred Shamed Partitions
So Callous In His Candor You Have To Coerce For Neglect
For Worse Or For Best I'm Confidant With A Verse Of Respect

!!ILLEST MINDS!!
Image
User avatar
Def-init
Elite Freestyler
Offline
Posts: 274
Joined: Wed Oct 08, 2008 9:48 am
Wins: 3
Losses: 3
Location: Toronto

Post by Def-init »

Thx bro. This one really wasnt all about flow. It was more for vocab than anything.
- If I can't bend Heaven, I shall move Hell. -
User avatar
$incEar
Novice
Offline
Posts: 63
Joined: Sat Oct 18, 2008 1:00 pm
Wins: 3
Losses: 2
Location: San Antonio

Post by $incEar »

i noticecd it wasnt about the flow..with that said I Think this would fit better in the distilled concepts ..it was tite though a Good Read ..Strong & Dirrect Vocab through out..at time even vivid in imagery ..7/10
Image
User avatar
Def-init
Elite Freestyler
Offline
Posts: 274
Joined: Wed Oct 08, 2008 9:48 am
Wins: 3
Losses: 3
Location: Toronto

Post by Def-init »

I was thinking about dropping it in the distilled concepts section
But was torn between both sections because there is a fair amount of flow in it
and that is what defines the difference between a poem and a rhyme to me. The way in which it flows. With this one I couldn't choose. It seemed right in the middle between each. When I write I just sit down and freestyle it and I dont second guess the emotion I put into my work. So I just desided to drop it and allow the readers to give there input.
- If I can't bend Heaven, I shall move Hell. -
User avatar
Prit-E
Rookie
Offline
Posts: 15
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2008 1:14 pm
Wins: 0
Losses: 0

Post by Prit-E »

...CONCEPT WAS COOL...FLOW WASN'T THERE..BUT I SEE THAT WASN'T THE POINT...I WOULD'VE STEPPED UP A NOTCH ON THE VOCAB...BUST OUT THE THESAURUS FOR THE NEXT ONE...CUZ THIS ONE WAS MORE POEMY...LOL IF THAT IS EVEN A WORD.
User avatar
precise
Elevated
Offline
Posts: 2435
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2006 6:08 am
Wins: 20
Losses: 7

Post by precise »

haha thanks for the dedication bro


The subject...raping a diabetic with Christmas cane candy

^^lol damn man

The black market buys and sells human organs
Old-fashioned fascism and anatomic Capitalism

^^^^niice

When the abrupt proclamation promised is the prophecy of police brutality

^^ i like the alliteration uve got in this line



n good call postin it here, u get alot more feed in scriptures than in distilled concepts, the rhymescheme for the most part was kinda subliminal hangin in the middle of lines but it was still there, loved the crazy vocab as usual, this was a kickass drop dude, loved the concepts, keep postin
Image


facin me? its mission impossible, like pickin up lesbian broads
fuck all these thespian frauds, they "bug me" like espionage
User avatar
Cee4
Rhyme Dominator
Offline
Posts: 2846
Joined: Thu May 31, 2007 9:52 pm
Wins: 58
Losses: 16

Post by Cee4 »

dope.

u have an original style which is good. u think 'outside the box'
u brought the imagery and the vocab

could of stepped it up with the multis to make it flow a bit better but it was more a poetic style so multis are not really that big a deal

good shit
Image
Image
Post Reply

Return to “Written Rhymes”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests