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the rightT time..
Moderators: Loon E Lou, Enlightend
the rightT time..
Hold up...
lemme take a step bak from reality
look at shit I lost
an some things I gained gradually
knowledge an respect is goldin in this liFe time..
u juss gota wait 2 make ur move
an exicute it at the right time...
me ...I've been waiting patiantly an countin my blessing
doin shit futuristic leave bitch niggas guessin
my next move is like a lighting strike
u never kno when ima hit..
till its too late an the tool is off my hip
now u facin
a non healthy situation
soo keep ur cool b4 I melt ur foundation
an hell is most definatly ur destination
u won't catch me there ur boy is too cool
new rule..
pZys claSs...
NEw skool
bk all day
wat a hell of a town
cause juss as fast as u think ur swiming
even faster ull drown
soo if u aint been payin attention
then ur listening now
soo no pitty
I get bizzy
try an get wit me..
fuck you
lemme take a step bak from reality
look at shit I lost
an some things I gained gradually
knowledge an respect is goldin in this liFe time..
u juss gota wait 2 make ur move
an exicute it at the right time...
me ...I've been waiting patiantly an countin my blessing
doin shit futuristic leave bitch niggas guessin
my next move is like a lighting strike
u never kno when ima hit..
till its too late an the tool is off my hip
now u facin
a non healthy situation
soo keep ur cool b4 I melt ur foundation
an hell is most definatly ur destination
u won't catch me there ur boy is too cool
new rule..
pZys claSs...
NEw skool
bk all day
wat a hell of a town
cause juss as fast as u think ur swiming
even faster ull drown
soo if u aint been payin attention
then ur listening now
soo no pitty
I get bizzy
try an get wit me..
fuck you
- ~Symbolikull~
- Rhyme Dominator
- Posts: 2799
- Joined: Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:19 pm
- Wins: 37
- Losses: 16
- Ambiguous Realm
- Army Of Three
- Posts: 3522
- Joined: Sun Jan 15, 2006 3:57 pm
- Wins: 46
- Losses: 14
- No Shows: 2
- Location: Earth
i dont think u need a link.. but a link would be from wherever u left feedback in the scriptures.. don't expect feedback if u don't give any either
a link would show as proof in a way...
this verse was ok i guess.. nothing impressive.. seemed kinda choppy..somethin i'd freestyle on a bad day lol
the topic was ok tho ..just needs some punches multis maybe get creative with it n throw in some wordplay
a link would show as proof in a way...
this verse was ok i guess.. nothing impressive.. seemed kinda choppy..somethin i'd freestyle on a bad day lol
the topic was ok tho ..just needs some punches multis maybe get creative with it n throw in some wordplay

- Ambiguous Realm
- Army Of Three
- Posts: 3522
- Joined: Sun Jan 15, 2006 3:57 pm
- Wins: 46
- Losses: 14
- No Shows: 2
- Location: Earth
wow ur really an idiot.. using dashes between the words that rhyme is strictly for indication.. as for me its a bit of a habit so at times i have to force myself not to depending if i want it showing it not...
and yes multies increase the flow... if it was a freestyle that's all u had to say cuz it sure seemed like something rushed n effortless...it doesn't NEED punchlines.. but it would be better with it..just becuz its not a battle verse or it isn't insulting n e one doesn't mean it can't have punchlines...
and just so u know.. ur too cocky for someone who freestyles somethin this shitty... even the shit u write that isn't freestyled sucks... u probably have less then a year lyrically under ur belt so lets save the cockiness for later when ur pillow biting
and yes multies increase the flow... if it was a freestyle that's all u had to say cuz it sure seemed like something rushed n effortless...it doesn't NEED punchlines.. but it would be better with it..just becuz its not a battle verse or it isn't insulting n e one doesn't mean it can't have punchlines...
and just so u know.. ur too cocky for someone who freestyles somethin this shitty... even the shit u write that isn't freestyled sucks... u probably have less then a year lyrically under ur belt so lets save the cockiness for later when ur pillow biting

Everything posteD to date has been a freestyle..either drivin in my car or in between doin shit at work...but wateva I feel wat ur sayin..I juss don't spit like that..if I had audio I wud probably be doin thhat cause the way I spit it juss flos..I juss don't understand how critisism has 2 be alomst like ur tryin 2 diss someone...not feelin that...
- Ambiguous Realm
- Army Of Three
- Posts: 3522
- Joined: Sun Jan 15, 2006 3:57 pm
- Wins: 46
- Losses: 14
- No Shows: 2
- Location: Earth
judging for what u wrote, i'd guess ur prolly around 14-15 of age.. many people know more about rap in here then u know about your dick.. so cut the amateur crap
anyway, back to the verse.. honestly i wasn't impressed, but as a first piece - guess it's okay.. listen to what ekoms said, it's called advice.. stay active, drop verses, give feedback..
anyway, back to the verse.. honestly i wasn't impressed, but as a first piece - guess it's okay.. listen to what ekoms said, it's called advice.. stay active, drop verses, give feedback..
R u fuckin serious...u guys strecht the limits of rhyming an my shit is bad?....half of everyone shit don't even ryhme..its not critisism if all use r doin is hateing...still aint mad tho..will abuse u bear...an anyone else...so0o open call outs still stand for any of u ...since u guys r the "kings" of rap...lmfao juss cause I'm not flowin like u idiots..my shit is bad...ahahahah...any of u who spit ur verses 2 any rapper..or someone with sence wud call u guys 1 liners an wit no skill..no meaning...juss puttin words 2gether juss 2 match..
- -TraMaTiK-
- Unstoppable Emcee
- Posts: 2046
- Joined: Fri Oct 13, 2006 7:59 am
- Wins: 6
- Losses: 17
Alright number one rule here on illest,u diss one person u diss everyone,if i recall u said 'half of everybodys shit dont rhyme' if u can please show proof of that ID LOVEEE to see it,anyways dont take this to heart but that 'freestyle' while u were drivin in'a car supposedly,was alright,nothin 2 gloat about as Ekoms mentioned b4,u take it how u want it,but this was ok for a freestyle,next time ur gonna drop actually put effort into it
- Ambiguous Realm
- Army Of Three
- Posts: 3522
- Joined: Sun Jan 15, 2006 3:57 pm
- Wins: 46
- Losses: 14
- No Shows: 2
- Location: Earth
lol so now u think im hating cuz i criticized ur shyt...funny one... there really is no limit to rhyming... and i dont know who the fuck's verses u've been reading but most of the shyt i read rhymes... unless u just dont know how to read then maybe u should seek some phonics help....here n there u'll find a few stretched bars from ppl.. but the majority of us don't really stretch it .. i'm guessing u probably just judge everyone off of one or two ppl... unless u actually read my shit n said its stretching.. then maybe u just don't know wtf stretching is...
just cuz i don't like ur shitty attitude and whiney bitch-made style doesn't mean i hate u.. i judge everyone on the same level... as far as scriptures go.. i'm judging it off based on u practically saying ur that damn good and then i read somethin like this.. cmon.. if u keystyle somethin this bad how the hell r u suppose to expect good feedback... or even be good enough to judge everyone else as if u know everything about rapping and rhyming.... unless u know the meaning of multies and inner multies as well as the all 3-5 versions of wordplay... then u really don't have enough knowledge to even talk about stretching the limits of rhyming if u don't even know that there is no limit to it.. this isn't mainstream garbage kid.. just cuz u like it so much u happen to write like them doesn't mean ur experienced enough to say the shit u say
there's only about 2-5 people on this site that know everything about fuckin rapping and rhyming..
just cuz i don't like ur shitty attitude and whiney bitch-made style doesn't mean i hate u.. i judge everyone on the same level... as far as scriptures go.. i'm judging it off based on u practically saying ur that damn good and then i read somethin like this.. cmon.. if u keystyle somethin this bad how the hell r u suppose to expect good feedback... or even be good enough to judge everyone else as if u know everything about rapping and rhyming.... unless u know the meaning of multies and inner multies as well as the all 3-5 versions of wordplay... then u really don't have enough knowledge to even talk about stretching the limits of rhyming if u don't even know that there is no limit to it.. this isn't mainstream garbage kid.. just cuz u like it so much u happen to write like them doesn't mean ur experienced enough to say the shit u say
there's only about 2-5 people on this site that know everything about fuckin rapping and rhyming..

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