Pandora's Box

[134282]

What is the blackest magic...? I had a vague grasping of the topic throughout the piece, then you ended it with the death of black magic. What does that mean...?

Your rhyme scheme, for the most part, was steady throughout, but a bit basic; it fell off in a few places, too. The references were vague in just about every line. At the end of this piece, I still have no idea what it's about.

[~Symbolikull~]

i thought it was a nice piece man, but it did fall off a bit in some places, and i do need the same answer what is the "blackest magic" i mean i know black magic but what the blackest spose to be???lol

soild drop

UppIN

[134282]

if i Wrote Any Longer Not Even As Many People Woulda Took Time To Leave Feed That Did...

There's your problem; stop writing for other people. Write for yourself. If you don't feel like "carrying it out for hours", then don't write it at all.

And no, the "fate and death" part was not evident. Clarity is equally important in a rhyme as flow, rhyme scheme, tone of voice and structure.

[Dead Silence]

i liked it the concept was a little hard to get of but i got it i liked it keep it up