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new kid on d block

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ninenite
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Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2011 2:01 pm

new kid on d block

Post by ninenite »

Just sit back n close ya eyes
Take a second visualize
Just relax n clear ya mind
Take a journey thru my life
Lemme show wat its like
All d pain I feel inside
All d hate I cannot hide
I'm just tryna survive
Wit a cold heart & black eyes
& a mind ahead of my time
So I just set myself aside
& disappear in the night
Sometimes I close my eyes
& look back on my life
& I can't help but wondering how the fuck I survived
my past is racing thru my mind
The anger the pain the lies
All those fucked up cold nights
Constant dark no light
Imn struggling wit all my might
To win this eternal fight
my chances are looking slim but fuck it I'm gonna try
Goin war against the world wit not a soul on my side
I'm just down to ride
Until the day dat I die
& I don't even kno why
I choose to live this life
But I know 1 thing... Dat I'm gotta survive

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Haz
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Location: The Port

Re: new kid on d block

Post by Haz »

Simple but thoughts out well..
not crazy lyrical, but told a story
I liked it,

cool piece
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DaPrince
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Re: new kid on d block

Post by DaPrince »

I agree with Haz, it is a bit simple and as far as technicality goes, there are few (if any) multi's or metaphors/similes but the flow is there and it stays on topic so keep writing, this is a good start.
I don't drop rhymes all the time, but when I do, I prefer to spit fire
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