free?

[the sentinel]

Livin my life like its a movie script nd the director bout to yell "cut",
i knw i fell but i dnt care coz im bout to quit too,roll a doobie get my throat slit.
aint talkin bout suicide im talkin bout freedom, coz im tearin up salty in seaform!
and soon be it, that i drown up nd sink up like a bad goon,so get your frown up!!
got bordered by ths thng called school mayne,failin that shit aint nun but a fools pain
coz i knw therz more to life so i be cool as plain and more agressive than max payne,breakin through life like its a glass pane.
i was born without a silver spoon in sight so i knws i gotsa hustle hard,it takes lotsa muscle to lift a credit card.

life's got me by the balls, probably thnkn tht imma hold him till he falls,no pain no gain right? so imma train to fight life until i get them million dollar calls, so life, u can just as well suck my balls...

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

[Ambiguous Realm]

well seeing this is a free i guess it makes no sense for me to be too critical, but definitely need to up your rhyme game, needs major work

[Enlightend]

lol i agree... even for a free... its very simple rhyme scheme... lyrical content was also very simple... keep up though...

[the sentinel]

thanks guys, the constructuve criticism really helps a lot...inspires me to post a lot too