M33Kish vs Arvincible (1st Round)

[Ambiguous Realm]

Rules
7 Bars/14 lines (MAX)
Due 96 hours(4 days) from time of this thread
First to 5 votes (3-0=ko/4-1=tko). Each day late is 1 against you
Voting must use categories with brief explanations.

Categories
-Storytelling
-Flow
-Creativity
-Rhyme scheme
-Metaphors & Similes
-Consistency
-Impact


M33Kish's topic is "Taking over the world"

Arvincible's topic is "My sick obsession"

[M33Kish]

Check.

[ Post made via Android ]

[Arvincible]

is this my battle? guess so.. check

[M33Kish]

Hi,
My name is Revolution.

Making quick work of a walk to remember on an island of embers.../
I've been gone since December yet the ash is still fresh on the timber/
My pocket is heavy from the letter reading "return to sender"/
Tenderly writtin with the slender slur that only my mother could render/
The wind whimpers in my limp ear, but I can still hear the tears fall/
Sweat simmers above my left brow as I anticipate the result of a rolecall/
The night creeps silently, blooming from the cracked streets core/
Greeting me as I weep my native country I've fought so hard to die for/
I came from a reason for being, to just wanting more/
The glory of leading my brothers to different shores was an outcome I hadn't thought of before.../
I fix my posture amidst the roar of the copters soaring above me/
The deafening throttle of their engines rumbling the crown set before me/
According to the history books, this will be the fall of a nation/
But in truth, this is my first step on the road of world domination/

[ Post made via Android ]

[Arvincible]

Rage, at the early stage of wrath, makes its path and way within me
Drained...im Feelin empty, Manifested from the pain, greed and envy
I used to keep it steady..
had kicks and the dopest shades where I now keep smoke grenades
and ropes and blades that i use to attack hotels and choke the maids
give the ho a fade while the blood and tears soak her braids..
Its all a joke i play, stalk em home and watch em unaware,
undress and shower they dont catch my stare, until i snatch their hair..
naked bare, they scream but the duct tape-solves-that..
I love the rush i get when i knock em with a baseball-bat
have their face fall flat, the pussy's great when its ripped-open!!
and head from a chick-chokin?! i cant get enough of leaving a bitch-broken!
Dominance, i get thrills from the adrenaline rushed down-my-spine
We all have a similar obsession, I just make a reality out-of-mine ..>:D

[Defiance]

-Storytelling-M33k
-Flow-Tie
-Creativity-Tie they both came correct
-Rhyme scheme-Tie
-Metaphors & Similes-Tie
-Consistency-Arv
-Impact-M33K

this shit was close.. but i'm edging more towards m33k simply for the reason, that his shit was an abstract view of the topic.. painted a great picture..

while arv on the other hand.. his shit was tight great multis and content.. but it didn't grab me like m33kish shit did


vote M33kish

good shit guys

[Sir Kevin O Shea]

This is an amazing show you guys put on. Much respect to both of you.

Storytelling: Arv
Flow: Arv
Creativity: M33k
Rhyme scheme: Arv
Metaphors & Similes:M33k
Consistency: Tied
Impact: Arv

Vote-Arv

[Shazo]

Storytelling: Arv
Flow: Tie
Creativity: M33k
Rhyme scheme: Arv
Metaphors & Similes:M33k
Consistency: Tie
Impact: Arv

Vote-Arv

[AntiMaTTer]

Hi,
My name is Revolution.

Making quick work of a walk to remember on an island of embers.../
I've been gone since December yet the ash is still fresh on the timber/
My pocket is heavy from the letter reading "return to sender"/
Tenderly writtin with the slender slur that only my mother could render/
hmm so far not exactly sure where this is going but rhymes is decent flow decent. but still lil ruff

The wind whimpers in my limp ear, but I can still hear the tears fall/
Sweat simmers above my left brow as I anticipate the result of a rolecall/
The night creeps silently, blooming from the cracked streets core/
Greeting me as I weep my native country I've fought so hard to die for/
I came from a reason for being, to just wanting more/
The glory of leading my brothers to different shores was an outcome I hadn't thought of before.../
I fix my posture amidst the roar of the copters soaring above me/
The deafening throttle of their engines rumbling the crown set before me/
According to the history books, this will be the fall of a nation/
But in truth, this is my first step on the road of world domination/

[ Post made via Android ]

hmm... well to be honest i was expecting a little bit more. I dont feel that it really pieced together as a story but as a spoken word but it did flow pretty well and had some decent stuff in it.

Rage, at the early stage of wrath, makes its path and way within me
Drained...im Feelin empty, Manifested from the pain, greed and envy
I used to keep it steady..
had kicks and the dopest shades where I now keep smoke grenades
and ropes and blades that i use to attack hotels and choke the maids
lol liked the rhyme scheme there at the last two lines. good imagery so far

give the ho a fade while the blood and tears soak her braids..
Its all a joke i play, stalk em home and watch em unaware,
undress and shower they dont catch my stare, until i snatch their hair..
naked bare, they scream but the duct tape-solves-that..
I love the rush i get when i knock em with a baseball-bat
diggin this part, the "rush" gave good imagery of a couple movies that remind me of this. good flow too

have their face fall flat, the pussy's great when its ripped-open!!
and head from a chick-chokin?! i cant get enough of leaving a bitch-broken!
Dominance, i get thrills from the adrenaline rushed down-my-spine
We all have a similar obsession, I just make a reality out-of-mine ..>:D
cool close

I was feeling this verse more than Av, both were good but i feel M3 brought it harder with the imagery, flow and just all around story telling.



Storytelling: M3
Flow: M3
Creativity: TIE
Rhyme scheme: M3
Metaphors & Similes:M33k
Consistency: Tie
Impact: TIE

VOTE=M33k

holla

[Ambiguous Realm]

nice... this could've gone either way from just reading it..

Storytelling:Tie (both delivered it well)
Flow: Arv
Creativity:Meek (seemed less "direct")
Rhyme scheme:Arv
Metaphors & Similes:tie
Consistency:tie
Impact:Tie (both had a solid closer)

vote: Arv

(reading his just felt smoother to me, arv was a bit more generic in his topic than meek, however i enjoyed some of the detailing, i did expect a bit more from arv but overall i think he barely edged this)



ALSO ADDING... anti after reading your post i think you confused meek and arv, the one you were complimenting was arv, although u ended up voting for meek

anyways... guys if you're part of the tournament (which all of you are lol..) please wait until i announce open voting for the tournament

until then... hold back on voting for this tournament and let the non-tourny participants do the voting


once more... NO VOTING


i'll make the announcement in 3 days after deadline(which is shortly about to come to a close)

[Arvincible]

lol i read antimatter's vote i was like wha? lol

[AntiMaTTer]

lol? im so confused anymore.



wow i may have been drunk when i did that...

it went to the second verse i quoted... which is ARV ... my mistake.

VOTE=ARV, same goes to the categories

[Ambiguous Realm]

4-1
arv wins by tko

-updated and closed-