The day

[Haz]

Look..

Times seem tough while rain hits my window
my mind seems stuck while pain sits by indo
in the air its cemented Like a wall of Gravity
beware whats presented or Recall the battery
a gift of energy can be motive for pay back
though Back pay means back track I can't Potray that
The Past is the past i'm Moving a head using some Meds
Popping In The Dome .. Crazy, Like I'm Proving Whats Said
Giving Over a Field Of An Audience My Poems In Stone
So they can brand my links that have shown whats Known
I'm a writer passed gone in cyphers Like a ghost
Been a fighter passed on by the brighter side of Hope..
Each page thats vivid beats rage thats fitted in a cage
thats lifted when the weights that shifted on my back
hits my blue print map unpissed off at the Days iv'e shitted
a way .. Like The lane that'll bring Us sane sight of gain
The Day..Light Is Framed Around our brains despite the rain
Havoc is a Disposable camera for me.. Picture that
The Images won't stay Like End results of the last Victors Stats
a change Is Due through the Led I Raise Out Of a Pen Thats Filled
my claims will Prove what I said will play,Ambition, the Friend Of skill
Keep thinking its all about a Washington you'll see In the End Thats Will
I Am Legend Thats The Truth As I'm Eyeing Lessons Iv'e Grabbed Since Youth
Bags Of Poof..Make the Prey O'D..Thats Gathered Proof, Play ya J O B

[QwarterZ]

Giving Over a Field Of An Audience My Poems In Stone
So they can brand my links that have shown whats Known
I'm a writer passed gone in cyphers Like a ghost
Been a fighter passed on by the brighter side of Hope..
Each page thats vivid beats rage thats fitted in a cage
thats lifted when the weights that shifted on my back
hits my blue print map unpissed off at the Days iv'e shitted
a way .. Like The lane that'll bring Us sane sight of gain


this......was my favorite section
it seems as if you just let loose and let ur pen move
which I really enjoy about your pieces
you show a glimpse of some reeeeeeallllll sick lyricism
but at times you seem to be blinded by idk what?
either way you really shined at that whole section
the way it just flows elegantly had me flabbergasted
nice drop my dude, keep writing!

[Haz]

but at times you seem to be blinded by idk what?

explain further if possible lol thanks for the feed, i'll return it

[IntrinsicCadence]

This is my favorite written piece you've dropped, for sure. You start off strong and maintain a real high level of lyricism throughout. Your expressions remain clear and vivid without ever gettin' cloudy (which some of the other drops I've read from you tend to do). The rhythm is dope, and the you bring the change ups in your rhyme scheme and the pace of the internal rhythm at just the right times. And the meaning in your lyrics is also really elevated, which definitely brings this to another level as a written piece. Well done...

[vanity]

i really liked how u started this:

Times seem tough while rain hits my window
my mind seems stuck while pain sits by indo
in the air its cemented Like a wall of Gravity
beware whats presented or Recall the battery
a gift of energy can be motive for pay back
though Back pay means back track I can't Potray that

had great multis, vocab was great n the flow was nice!

Giving Over a Field Of An Audience My Poems In Stone
So they can brand my links that have shown whats Known
I'm a writer passed gone in cyphers Like a ghost
Been a fighter passed on by the brighter side of Hope..

^^^ great lines....

i enjoyed reading this a lot!

[Haz]

I appreciate the feed vanity.