Renting a movie (Topical battle verse)

[Kau the Lion]

The topic was to rap about going to Blockbuster and what you get there. Unfortunately my opponent couldn't make it. I've had two topical battles on this site so far and both were no shows. Hopefully history doesn't repeat itself for the next round of the tourney. Anyway...


I bench-press DVD racks to relax,
A movie buff in every sense of the syntax.
So on this extra long Thanksgiving weekend
I’m ready to kick back with the cinema streaming.
I head on down to my local Blockbuster.
Avoid that one employee who’s a total cocksucker.
Find the cute girl who’s stocking the shelves
Try to flirt a little bit but just talk to myself.
Whatever, bitch, it’s cool. I got shit to do.
Start browsing around for the right flicks to view.

A corny comedy with some slapstick humor.
“It might be a tumor.” “It’s not a tumor!”
Maybe it’s high time for some sci-fi fantasy.
A sports drama could bring out the champ in me.
A perfect murder mystery searching for the killer.
Or an action-packed, death-defying, stunt filled thriller.
An old Chinese kung-fu movie might kick ass.
But skip past the chick flicks fast unless a bitch ask.
Spaghetti westerns where they shoot from the hip,
Versus car chases with famous spies using their wits.
A faster pace slasher makes gore and more tits.
On the flip-side: a drama’s Oscar-winning performance.
I could watch some biopics to learn who people are,
Enjoy the dark subtle atmosphere of a film-noir.

With so many choices I could spend forever deciding it.
“Sir, are you ready? The store closes in five minutes.”
Cocksucker, you’d better check your neck, bitch.
Fuck Blockbuster! I’m going home to watch Netflix!

[Momeijah]

A corny comedy with some slapstick humor.
“It might be a tumor.” “It’s not a tumor!”

^HAHAHAHAHAHA yessss.

This was awesome, a simple straightforward topic with endless ways to execute it. It was structured brilliantly. 1st verse setting the scene, into ur thoughts, then back to reality. The middle was my favourite part, u presented everything fine with no breaks in the flow. Decent rhymeschemes, nothing forced in there. Overall an enjoyable read, u showcased ur skill while keeping it all lighthearted. Keep droppin.

[Kuhlerblynd]

I really liked this piece, and had no problem following it or getting bored with it as I read it. Definitely entertaining. I have to say I like the middle the most as well, simply because of how you went from each genre to each genre. The chick flick line had me rolling. I also liked how you went thru the story, but the ending was pretty predictable. For some reason, I knew it was going to end with something about Netflix... Keep dropping fammo. One.

[Kau the Lion]

A corny comedy with some slapstick humor.
“It might be a tumor.” “It’s not a tumor!”

^HAHAHAHAHAHA yessss.

I'm glad that quote wasn't wasted.

Thanks for the props, guys.

[Lyrical Gen]

This was funny as hell. You know it's a good drop because I actually looked away from the Eagles-Texans game for 2 minutes to read this lol

I head on down to my local Blockbuster.
Avoid that one employee who’s a total cocksucker.
^^^That was funny as hell. Everybody knows that one person lol.

An old Chinese kung-fu movie might kick ass.
But skip past the chick flicks fast unless a bitch ask.
Spaghetti westerns where they shoot from the hip,
Versus car chases with famous spies using their wits.
^^^Nice

Keep droppin, this was entertaining.

[IntrinsicCadence]

This was a solid verse, with a solid flow, though it doesn't seem to have quite as much creativity as I'm used to seeing from you. It was entertaining though, and certainly had it's funny moments. The rhythm of the flow was good, as all your drops tend to be, but the rhyme scheme contained less multis then u usually have and was just more simple overall than usual. I also think that your first part of the verse (kinda like an intro thing) takes up too many lines, lines like the flirting with girl thing are funny, but have no context with anything else going on, if something about the girl or the asshole employee came up again later I think those lines 'd have more impact. That's my two sense, u got a good verse here, but it's far from the best I've read from you...

[Kau the Lion]

Oh but the asshole did come back. But yeah, I have to agree that I didn't get real creative with this one. I literally wrote it in less than an hour the night that it was due. Between 10 and 12 the night it was due to be precise. Many thanks for your input.

[Lawgix]

dude this was cool... real laid back... i could honestly see this as a interlude on an album... Track 6 Movie Renting... that would be pretty sick...

[QwarterZ]

I literally lol'd through most of this...really smooth transitions and making the person reading feel like their not the only person that goes through this...which takes this piece up a notch...I may have to agree without the multis its not REAL impressive..but when it comes to topicals the main goal is to garner attention and keep the idea progressing through fluently which you did...a very good drop from you man...nice way to flip this piece keep doing you

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[Kau the Lion]

Thanks for the feed, guys.

[sylent]

Nice drop man its always good to read a humorous topical u got skill no doubt keep on doin ya thing lookin forward to seein more from you

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[The Man]

Good stuff.