A little somethin somethin I wrote yesterday.... Check it out and then please leave some feedback. I wrote it as a spoken word/acapella verse but I guess it could be made into a song if I found the right beat.
No Peace
We won't have peace on our streets until the streets get a piece
Tupac said that in '96, but its still true now, got enemies
Killin dudes, and themselves goin out shootin
For red & blue now just like they did for red & blue then
So until the streets get a piece there won't never be no peace
Yeah that's a triple negative - it means the violence will never cease
And gun control isn't the answer, nah you see:
The root cause of all this is the poverty
And our so-called "Representatives," at least nominally
Those bullshittin politicians up on pedestals, preachin hypocricy
Caterin to rich crackers with their government policies
That continue to further economic inequality
Then they go home and they eat phenomenally
While mad people in their own cities struggle abdominally
And from San Diego to Vallejo you can see the same thing:
Strugglin. Which is why dudes start to slang cane,
Pimp, and gang bang, quick to aim things; click click and bang bang
Attain, solve, and gain by lettin brains hang
In this vein, fools live in the fast-movin lane
Chasin chains, cash, ass, and Mary Jane
But it's insane mayne, because they can't maintain
And before long its them that ends up plain slain
The few survivors go psycho in the cycle dude
And unless their kids can ball like Michael do
They get caught up in the cycle too, chasin a quick buck and a dream of being a stunna fool
It's shitty, I don't think many in Washington give a fuck - but what are YOU gonna do?
Don't just sit there and look around, like "Well, somebody has to stop this"
Nah. WE need to make the change, like when we put Obama's ass in office
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"No Peace"
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Re: "No Peace"
this was nicely written...but...are you from the streets? im not one to judge but ur avatar is fucking me up without a doubt ur talented n i hope ur not posing
- ReCkinAll
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Re: "No Peace"
I'll give you an A for effort on this one....
nice attempt but it was kinda plain in my eyes the first line was iight but then again it was pac so id say just elevate your style and get alittle more complex dont be so basic theres a time and place for that.....
good try tho....
nice attempt but it was kinda plain in my eyes the first line was iight but then again it was pac so id say just elevate your style and get alittle more complex dont be so basic theres a time and place for that.....
good try tho....


Re: "No Peace"
edited... not worth dealing with the ignoranceK KiLLaH wrote:this was nicely written...but...are you from the streets? im not one to judge but ur avatar is fucking me up without a doubt ur talented n i hope ur not posing
Peace + thanks for the feedback
Last edited by Koonu on Sat Jun 06, 2009 6:42 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Re: "No Peace"
haha yeah.... my bad, i just dont really like when people are ignorant.ReCkinAll wrote:now id say thats enuff feed back for everybody...lol
PS - K KiLLaH maybe you will find this avatar more acceptable.
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Re: "No Peace"
Meow, son. I liked this piece. Sure, it could have benefited from some complexity but who are we to tell an author how to tell his story. Either way, I liked some of the concepts, the flow was fairly consistent. I think some multies would spice it up a little bit and make it seem a little more lively. Its hard to keep someone's attention when talking about politics. Its a pretty boring topic to begin with no matter what perspective you deliver from. Not a bad post, though. Just don't let the e-kids eat you alive...
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