YOU NEVER KNOW

Expand your artistic ability through poetry and story telling. Poetry has been given new life ever since the inception of hip hop. Relax for a minute and explore your poetic side here.

Moderators: Loon E Lou, Kuhlerblynd, Glamtrash, Borat

Post Reply
User avatar
Grim
Elite Freestyler
Posts: 451
Joined: Wed Mar 16, 2011 11:00 pm
Wins: 33
Losses: 11
No Shows: 1
Location: Grand Rapids,Michigan,USA
Contact:

YOU NEVER KNOW

Post by Grim »

THIS WAS A SONG I WROTE FOR MY GIRL AS A POEM..SO WHEN I DO THIS SONG I TALK/RAP IT...I wrote this in poetry form and it reads in poetry frm although it's simple it was from the heart.

Baby girl's so fine it's ridiculous.
Baby girl's got a mind that's articulate.
Precious and sweet...my ghetto princess.
I'll let you read all about it like a printing press.
She's kind, caring,sexy, and crazy to boot.
I thought she was a dream but she's amazingly true.
It's hard to believe I found the perfect girl.
Especially in this uptight and nervous world.
With all the fish in the sea I found the perfect pearl.
We may go thru ups and downs but it'll be worth it girl.
I love it when we say good night and you call me boo.
I'll do every thing I can to be a better man..it's all for you.
Even before we experience the physical touch.
I feel my heart racing from this litteral rush.
It appears that this feeling is more than a crush.
Your warmth is melting my ice cold heart to slush.

CHORUS:x2
The world of love is a place i thought I'd never go.
But I'm glad I took the journey cause you never know.
Been flipping thru channels in life but you're a better show.
It's O.K. to let your guard down cause you never know.


VERSE2:
I can't help but feel we got something special and pure.
we can share the good times and the rest we'll endure.
Together as one, we'll be there for eachother.
Sharing a love compared to no other.
The connection we share is electrifying.
To think what the future holds could be petrifying
But in this jungle there's no struggle...lioness and lion.
Animal instincts...so pure and simple
You've got my heart about to burst like a teenage pimple.
Every time we talk I get the cheesiest smile.
Go to the ends of the world for you like it's the easiest mile.
This isn't about lust..it's all about trust.
We're eachother's rocks but what's under the crust
Is way more important..could this be love?
It's too early to tell but girl you know what?
I got a thing for you and I can't let go
Girl we gotta take this chance cause you never know.

CHORUS:X2
[center]Image[/center]

User avatar
Dynamiq
Rap Assassin
Posts: 631
Joined: Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:29 pm
Wins: 5
Losses: 4
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: YOU NEVER KNOW

Post by Dynamiq »

the rhymeschemes were great,i loved the imagery you put in this. clever choice of words as well.

4/5
Image
Image
All Audio Battle Record
8-0-8
Brandon Heat (KO)
Falix (KO)
KraZyLyrical (KO)
Yasii(KO)
Led Poison(KO)
Jay 3rd (KO)
Demo (KO)
Pdubz (KO)
M.Flight (KO)
All Time Text Record
[89-15-81]

User avatar
Glamtrash
Poetic Juggernaut
Posts: 1496
Joined: Thu Nov 22, 2007 3:42 pm
Wins: 0
Losses: 0
Location: Where the Treetops Kiss the Stars

Re: YOU NEVER KNOW

Post by Glamtrash »

It's so cute I wanna hurl Lol, not bad, although I refer more comlex writing. But, it is what it is and it's just so fuckin' cute I can't say anything bad about it. Lol good job.

[ Post made via Mobile Device ] Image

User avatar
Borat
Lazy Ass
Posts: 802
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2006 10:25 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 2
No Shows: 1

Re: YOU NEVER KNOW

Post by Borat »

We're eachother's rocks but what's under the crust
Is way more important..could this be love?

I really like that line, overall this is a nice little love drop you got right here, You have alot of emotion and I can almost feel what you are feeling. I guess I have felt like this before so it's refreshing to see that I'm not the only one haha, I would like to see you dig deeper cause i think the emotion will be CRAZY it's kinda like you only scratched the surface of how you really feel... good shit tho and please keep them coming.
POET OF THE YEAR 2011
Image
I'm often soft like cotton but my message is clear, my words hold weight like "dumbos" ears.
Image
Image

Post Reply

Return to “The Poet's Stage”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest