can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Expand your artistic ability through poetry and story telling. Poetry has been given new life ever since the inception of hip hop. Relax for a minute and explore your poetic side here.

Moderators: Loon E Lou, Kuhlerblynd, Glamtrash, Borat

Post Reply
User avatar
Borat
Lazy Ass
Posts: 802
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2006 10:25 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 2
No Shows: 1

can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Borat »

You can’t go around fixin’ problems when you aren’t quite fixed yourself.
He said.
Sooner or later, everything you have ever built
Will
Come
Crashing
Down
On
Top
Of
You…

I could tell he knew what he was talking about by the way he held his hammer.
Like my attention… beaten to death.
I can’t focus on these broken homes “Mr. Fix Everything”
So give me a break…
Or give me understanding.
Cut me out
Or glue me in.

They say “home is where the heart is”
…When I can’t find your love it leaves us both homeless.
I cut, collected and counted the days that passed after you left.
That’s 7,665 days
Or
183,960 hours.
I keep them all right here… In my heart.

I’m using them to build us a castle in the sky.
So, bring yourself.
Bring your love.
And come on up.

I’m not quite fixed but I’m working on my problems.
The foundation is set, our love isn’t fully built
Here yet but… pop’s I want you to know.

I’ve attached a rope from our roof to the sun.
So when everything I have ever built comes crashing down.
We can let it all fall...
And keep our love from ever hitting the ground.

-- Fri Mar 26, 2010 5:59 am --

Hmmm
Last edited by Borat on Thu Feb 25, 2010 3:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
FlipSide
Flow Creation
Flow Creation
Posts: 1473
Joined: Fri Mar 19, 2010 9:37 am
Wins: 0
Losses: 0
Location: Chicago IL
Contact:

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by FlipSide »

They say “home is where the heart is”
…When I can’t find your love it leaves us both homeless.
I’ve attached a rope from our roof to the sun.
So when everything I have ever built comes crashing down.
We can let it all fall...
And keep our love from ever hitting the ground.

ur a fucking poet my dude...i mean that in the best of ways...u deep sun... u should write a book similar to the tower series..always enjoy reading ur drops duke
BANG BANG!!!! I Shot U Down
̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=(•̪•)=ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿ -
Image

User avatar
Lawgix
The Aphilliated Assasin
Posts: 4214
Joined: Thu Sep 21, 2006 3:25 pm
Wins: 14
Losses: 8

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Lawgix »

this was pretty dope... talkin to ur dad right? maybe... i dunno... newayz it was hella deep bruh good read... real good job man

now GO MOW THE LAWN!!!! lol
Don't Let The Game Make U, Make Urself

Lawgix

Illest Radio

Image

"Sometimes You Gotta Stand By Your Failures To Recognize Your Success" Joe Budden

pest wrote:You look Easy... Whats Good?
AntiMaTTer wrote:lmao ...is this how you hit on all the chicks?

Loon E Lou
Fuck You, Pay Me
Posts: 1024
Joined: Thu Jan 14, 2010 5:46 am
Wins: 11
Losses: 6
Location: 831, California

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Loon E Lou »

maaaan. im tellin ya. u got dope stories dawg. ur shit is so dope, i can bag it up and sell it. haha. na but really this was ku. i liked it

User avatar
Borat
Lazy Ass
Posts: 802
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2006 10:25 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 2
No Shows: 1

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Borat »

Thanks for the feed playa's

[ Post made via Mobile Device ] Image

User avatar
- Mutual -
Supreme Lyricist
Posts: 4442
Joined: Wed Apr 09, 2008 2:01 am
Wins: 5
Losses: 11
Location: Dont Live In One
Contact:

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by - Mutual - »

this was some deep shit on the real mayne i didnt think you were this good at writin poetry i thought yeah he'll be nice but damm dope shit mayne i'm a keep my eyes out for more
The Eagerness Is Putrid My Fluids Acid Leaves You Vexed Like Black Holes
Your Inept To Correct Stretched Like Fat Folds Perplexed Like Castro
I'm So Tenacious With Rhymes Sensatious So Patient With Lines
While You Fill Your Writtens With Filler And So Stay Vacant In Mind
I'm Amiable But Too Your Haters I Appease Your Arcane Admissions
Dark Games No Vision Your Avarice Lead To Scarred Shamed Partitions
So Callous In His Candor You Have To Coerce For Neglect
For Worse Or For Best I'm Confidant With A Verse Of Respect

!!ILLEST MINDS!!
Image

User avatar
QwarterZ
Rap Professional
Posts: 1688
Joined: Thu Oct 29, 2009 7:01 am
Wins: 4
Losses: 9

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by QwarterZ »

told him to fix himself








but this was a purdy nice piece
it's written differently but has that vibe
that vibe that makes you want to read it again
my bad for taking so long.....did it for the lulz

I'm feelin' this tho'! write another!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

User avatar
Borat
Lazy Ass
Posts: 802
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2006 10:25 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 2
No Shows: 1

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Borat »

Thanks for the feed ya'll I preciate it.
POET OF THE YEAR 2011
Image
I'm often soft like cotton but my message is clear, my words hold weight like "dumbos" ears.
Image
Image

User avatar
NoVeL
Rap Assassin
Posts: 737
Joined: Sat Apr 04, 2009 12:29 pm
Wins: 14
Losses: 28
No Shows: 10000

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by NoVeL »

I could tell he knew what he was talking about by the way he held his hammer.
Like my attention… beaten to death.
I can’t focus on these broken homes “Mr. Fix Everything”
So give me a break…
Or give me understanding.
Cut me out
Or glue me in.
That Just Seems Like A Dad Wanting A Son 2 Pay Attention, I Like How You Captivated The Reader's Interest Here Which Made It An Expensive Piece. Also
You can’t go around fixin’ problems when you aren’t quite fixed yourself.
He said.
Sooner or later, everything you have ever built
Will
Come
Crashing
Down
On
Top
Of
You…
I Enjoyed The Structure Of Haiku 2 Explain The Emotion Of The Drop. Dope I Say... Dope!!

Very Outstanding Riposte, I Look Forward 2 Viewing Your Pieces in Public Libraries One Day.

User avatar
Borat
Lazy Ass
Posts: 802
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2006 10:25 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 2
No Shows: 1

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Borat »

Word

[ Post made via Mobile Device ] Image

-- Sun Apr 17, 2011 3:02 pm --

Uppin
POET OF THE YEAR 2011
Image
I'm often soft like cotton but my message is clear, my words hold weight like "dumbos" ears.
Image
Image

KING RUM12
Rhyme Master
Posts: 151
Joined: Wed Jun 15, 2011 7:55 pm
Wins: 3
Losses: 8
No Shows: 3
Location: WinDy CitY

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by KING RUM12 »

Damn cn really relate to this...n Wut structure ...beautifully put together ..understandable ...made me read it a couple more times lol...nice drop

[ Post made via Android ] Image
-_sarcastically speaking_-

Image

User avatar
Moneymaker
Rhyme Master
Posts: 232
Joined: Sun Feb 27, 2011 1:48 pm
Wins: 4
Losses: 16
No Shows: 1
Location: long island, ny

Re: can't fix problems till you fix urself.

Post by Moneymaker »

this shit was DOPE i could relate to some of this shit. keep the poems coming

Post Reply

Return to “The Poet's Stage”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests