Hip Hop Forum

Like i've said...this isn't my talent. but i figured i'd give at a shot.


So you think you got, these bricks under lock//but don't you know you are. the fiend of the block//You hear it everyday so i don't know what your problem is//you actin top gangsta you the mothafuckin' bottom kid//snakey little fucka, neva deserve trust//"gotcha back, gotcha back", but now you on the rush//Locked trunk, cut snuffed, you could neva get touched// but y'all neva eva fucked wit us.

Y'all dissin, now missin, yo i used to feel bad about it//but i ain't doubt it, i dig at it, man i gotta be bout it//I roll heatless, ballsy bitch, takin the risk//can't win em all but i'm good wit the fists//n if the drama really comes the raz is taped to the wrist.

well..idk where ur headed with this,like if ur gonna continue poetry or keep tryin this,but its basic,u gotta grasp on rhyming obviously which is cool..structure iz messy as hell but flow isnt bad compared 2 some new ppl who drop..newayz..does this go 2 a beat@all?

Haha nah, like i said...i basically just wanted to see if i could do it. Poetry's my schtick. i might fuck around with this from time to time but nothing serious. I'm a singer and a poet, not a rapper. But, I figured if i'm going to be a part of this site, i may as well try n do what yall do.

So you think you got, these bricks under lock//but don't you know you are. the fiend of the block//You hear it everyday so i don't know what your problem is//you actin top gangsta you the mothafuckin' bottom kid//snakey little fucka, neva deserve trust//"gotcha back, gotcha back", but now you on the rush//Locked trunk, cut snuffed, you could neva get touched// but y'all neva eva fucked wit us.

Y'all dissin, now missin, yo i used to feel bad about it//but i ain't doubt it, i dig at it, man i gotta be bout it//I roll heatless, ballsy bitch, takin the risk//can't win em all but i'm good wit the fists//n if the drama really comes the raz is taped to the wrist.
^^ Basically.. you Needa Fix Your Structure.. jus So when People read your Stuff they Dont Have to Go back and Read it over Again.. i Didnt Mind.. but jus Some Advice.. And i Know this Typa Stuff Ain ya Thing or Wuddeva But Keep Droppin.. Try Fixin ya Structure.. Maybe Work on ya Flow..And u'll Get the Hang of it..

By the Way your Poetry is Sick...