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Broken
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 6:00 pm
by ThaBitchYouHate
The first time i met u i knew id fall for you/it took some time to see ud fall for me too now that i have Loved and lost i feel so down and cold/ Thinkin of the Promise u made when u said out Love would never grow old /broken hearted once again i always feel this way/ stuck again with thoughts of you not nowin what to say
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 6:17 pm
by LadieHazard
Damn mami i feel this one you gettin betta at ya flowz cus at first u didnt even kno what rhyming ment lmao but ur shits gettin hot jus throw some word play and fix ur structure n make ur bars even
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 6:58 pm
by Lawgix
this is pretty good for a first poem drop... go around on this page n look at different structures n play around with em... n make one thats unique enough for u... cause structure isn't really all that necessary in poems its more about the words u use... the dictionary helped me alot with my vocab... so good job don't worry bout makin ur "bars even" iuno what that even means to be honest... n alot of people don't have to rhyme to make a poem... as long as its deep n ALWAYS stay on subject... good drop tho
peace
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 7:00 pm
by LadieHazard
i mean by MAKEN UR BARS EVEN dont write to much inbetween the words ur rhymin thas what every other person on here told me to fix wit mine
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 7:09 pm
by Lawgix
poetry is different than writing a verse... a verse has to be short sweet n to the point... a poem... thats different more freedom to express urself... look at mine for example no limitations on how "long" a line has to be... most of the emcees on here do that... that write poetry...
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 7:13 pm
by LadieHazard
have u seen the poem i posted silent screamz
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 7:36 pm
by Lawgix
no...