Hip Hop Forum

http://illestlyrics.com/board/this-is-h ... t2857.html

another day passes and another day my ink spills
not stoppin 2 see what i do,or think,kills
but i realized we gotta problem in hip hop
we got mainstream bitches tryna skip & hop
thru the radio play and stay for a day
makin millions offa sumthin they neva made
2getha we pray, and search 4 unity
while these fake thugs damage the community
they've sworn 2 up hold,and yup its old
watchin ppl like 50 sayin shit thats been told
we no ppl are hungry we no ppl are homeless
but dont think 4 a fuckin second u own this
rap game,u got crap 2 ur name if u think 'u-neek'
try ur hand on me ill bet u fold quickly geek
only thing pure in the game is R-n-B
and part of them are within me
so i speak the truth even thru tradgedy
hopin that the mainstream wont b grabbin me
shiiit i had it b,i dont care if im 'rag-dy'
im what hip hop is missin,so go ahead be mad @ me

Domino...

The Television is Flooded With Billboards Of Ringtones ..//
Bling, Coats, Sing-Notes Bout Swingin-Ho's, it's Just Bringin-More ..//
R&B Stars Rappin About Bitches They Wouldn't-Have ..//
if They Never Made a Mil, False as Their Jewels it's Truly-Sad ..//
it's Missin Lyricists, Killin it Spittin Shit That Makes ur Brain-Smoulder ..//
50 Cent's a Fuckin R&B Singer, They Threw a Chain-Over ..//
And Fabricated His Past, Only a Rapper Cuz He Has-The-Look ..//
This Fag-is-Shook, i'll Laugh-n-Look at This Faggot Rappin, Sad-To-Look ..//
it's Killin Me, Bow Wow's Been Rich Since He Was 6, He Never Killed-a-G ..//
Take-Over? They're Takin Over The Fuckin Ringtone industry ..//
a Hundred-Mil-See, False Frontin Till They're Filthy-Rich-B ..//
You'll Never See No-One On a Street Corner Bumpin-50 ..//
They've Snatched Rap From The Street, And Given it 2 Teenage-Girls ..//
That Only Hear The Hooks, And See The Photoshoots, See-They-Killed ..//
The Days-Of-When, Dames-n-Men, Respected-The-Lyrics ..//
Now it's Dead-And-Diminished, it's Missin Credit-For-Lyrics ..//
Rap's Turned into Another input For The Tyrancy-Among-Us ..//
Using Lyricists as Pawns, What This Dynasty-Has-Strung-Up ..//

This Track is Koo` ..
Old Concept .. But i Liked Tha Points That Were Made in Tha Verses ..
Lyrically Wise .. Tramatik Fell Off On a Few Bars .. He Coulda Made Things a Bit Better .. & added Some Type Of Complex Shit to it .. `cus U Sounded Juss Like Tha Rappers U Called Out .. Simple ..
Domino Came Pretty Good .. Multies Were Okay .. But it Seems Like U Try To Make Multies Too Much .. & Then Start Throwin` Random Words in There `cus They Rhyme .. U Gotta Make all Of Them Flow Too .. Tha`s important Even For Text Verses .. Umm .. Even Verses Wit Like Simple Multies That Flow Really Well Could Be Good .. So Practice That ..

lol Rell Damn Nigga I See U Tryna Son
Niggaz .. Pssh Na But Yo Str8 Shit lol I Liked
It Yall Do u .. Jus Develope That Style ..

Rap's Turned into Another input For The Tyrancy-Among-Us ..//
Using Lyricists as Pawns, What This Dynasty-Has-Strung-Up ..//

fav line domino

all in all i liked ya verse.. multies were good, although i agree wit rell that u sometimes try too much to create good multies, so it got a lil bit twisted.. flow and vocab was straight.. keep droppin!


"rap game,u got crap 2 ur name if u think 'u-neek'
try ur hand on me ill bet u fold quickly geek
only thing pure in the game is R-n-B
and part of them are within me "

tramatik u sorta ruined ya flow a bit here.. but the verse was straight, although u need to work on vocab... ya multies were basic, don't really matter that much as long as u create a tight flow, which u had.. work on vocab and that'll help u alot! keep em comin!!

ye i see what u mean but i wasnt tryna be real lyrical with it..but thanx 4 the advice -1-