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sever-and-kill-vt25816.html#p191962
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My life's more up in smoke, then the joint that i puff//
i still get the crouds hands up, like the point of a gun//
I got to keep rapping cause shit, that choice is a must//
i make heads flip, like there was a coin on my thumb//
I've spent 18 years on this shit, and im still waiting to be//
A kid that loves rapping, but is still hating the scence//
its blatant to me, i wont stop, no way i'm facing defeat//
I must be running in my sleep, the way i'm chasing a dream//
I get excited when i write a spit, its basically the life i live//
I've never thought of suicide, but i would probably die for this//
That is the vital bit, uploading till my tracks go viral..shit//
And if your a king, then test me your bound to get your title stripped//
My body is hiphop, and i really do have the ear for a beat//
I don't care though, really who's going to hear what i speak//
i got love for the strong, and there's no fear for the weak//
But i still murder rappers, just with out the tear on my cheek//

First, I want to say I cant believe this hasnt received any feed yet... And also ask that you feed my piece "Puzzling"... Okay, let's get to it...

My life's more up in smoke, then the joint that i puff//
i still get the crouds hands up, like the point of a gun//

Nice opener, seems like you are going for a 'shake the rust off' approach more than anything, but hell, Im liking what Im reading so far... The multi's are on point, helping the flow be more exact, and Im digging the wording here...

I got to keep rapping cause shit, that choice is a must//
I make heads flip, like there was a coin on my thumb//

That last line had me chuckling a little bit. Nice way of putting this together...

I've spent 18 years on this shit, and im still waiting to be//
A kid that loves rapping, but is still hating the scence//

I can feel this bar to the core, most definitely.

its blatant to me, i wont stop, no way i'm facing defeat//
I must be running in my sleep, the way i'm chasing a dream//

Another nice line, done well with the wording.

I get excited when i write a spit, its basically the life i live//
I've never thought of suicide, but i would probably die for this//

Fucking nicely put together bar here fam. Really feeling this one!

That is the vital bit, uploading till my tracks go viral..shit//
And if your a king, then test me your bound to get your title stripped//

Word, keeping it going...

My body is hiphop, and i really do have the ear for a beat//
I don't care though, really who's going to hear what i speak//

Truth spoken from a real artist here...

i got love for the strong, and there's no fear for the weak//
But i still murder rappers, just with out the tear on my cheek//

Nice little jab at rappers with the tats and shit on their faces....



Over-all

I still agree with what I said at the beginning, this seemed to be something you were shaking the rust off with, as far as a written piece goes. I liked the imagery, wording, you threw in some punchlines, and kept the flow going smooth. While this isn't the best piece Ive read from you, mostly because it's just a little 'all over the place', but this was a cool way of introducing your style to some of the new cats, and letting the vets know you havent lost it. Nicely done fam. Let's see some more drops from you soon! One!

First 2 bars don't like, next 2 bars clever, the rest.... Dope!!!!! Love it any real emcee can relate to this it should be called "the real emcees anthem"

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DAMNNNNNNNNNN flow was exquisite rhyme scheme inners multi's everything was dope man very professionally done.. i cant big it up enough dude. you wrote it you know how good it is.. Much respect

its blatant to me, i wont stop, no way i'm facing defeat//
I must be running in my sleep, the way i'm chasing a dream//
I get excited when i write a spit, its basically the life i live//
I've never thought of suicide, but i would probably die for this//


Best part of the verse...
this was cool, I enjoyed the read, keep dropping