Hip Hop Forum

I'm at WAR with this INNER BEING--->Lost in the WORLD//
in my head a DEMONS SCREAMING,watch me BOX with my GIRL//
FEELING PAIN-all I've ever known is this RAGE//
fuck around and slice my wrist-I wanna LOOK at my VEINS//
can I explain?...-nah you know I probably couldn't//
call me SICK cause I do things that you probably wouldn't//
yes I'm back-FATAL X-the ILLNESS in RAP//
bring the WORLD to a STANDSTILL-fill in the GAPS//
I want a bil' and a half-before this COMES to an END//
its APOCOLYPSE NOW-FUCK you and your FRIENDS//
I'm the TRUEST to SIN-about to CAST a NEW SHADOW//
ECLIPSE the WHOLE EARTH,then leave that mothef*cker RATTLEd//
its the last of all Adams,where's the Garden and EVE?//
Impart the world with blind faith,and watch them harness the greed//
you see at large Im a thief-oh' how I walk in the DARKNESS//
and theres no need to lie-even God thinks Im heartless//



http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/spart ... 25072.html
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/got-a ... 24682.html

-- Wed Dec 14, 2011 3:25 pm --
pretty quick key wit a couple nice lines...

dude this was a nice lil written man.. had some sweet inner rhymes and punches man. also great flow.

nice to see you back on board man..

keep writing man.

Nice flow. Some decent concepts there. Nothing too substantial, though. Keep it up.

Decent drop.

Vocab is okay. Punches were okay.
The rhymes you used were very basic.
Structure and flow were good.

But, the capitalized words kinda threw me off.
Seems like it's a common thing on this site though.

Props!

<3

PS: Welcome Back.