Hip Hop Forum

The nights end brings the main event the stage.. set a ring of blood stained cement
a place where pain, death and anger is encased and contained inside a chain fence
this is as real as a game gets, the rules of the Ring are easy, PROCEED LAWLESS
now lets get this beef started, but heed caution cus this isnt for the weak hearted


COMEBACK KID...

SILENCE, i'm a hybrid, remove this guys eyelids with despised violence,
fork up his structured style like tridents subsidence,
skill level on the rise you in demise under mine,
my multi rhymes make this other guys lines look undermined,
a hundred times undenied, leave you dead like undercide (undecided)
bitch is frightened,strike his scriptures like lightning,
he's gifted at typing but my mic fighting's on par with mike Tyson,

cheek leaking is cheap

i'll creep in at his peak an start defeating this freak,
cuz eating his hearts the only way im feeling his beats.
leave him dreaming defeat(the feet) like a fetishist at peace,
believe it he's weak, turn the tables, an animal putting a veteran to sleep.
fill his body with concoctions of toxins
an chop limbs to stop him,
breeze free's until
this g seems to freeze then defrost him wit hot skill.
see i've got will but this bitch is not ill period.
the only time this pussy's drops spill. is period
see he's a big disappointment like the sex in the city films
its lights out or light end my friend like you aint paid your electricity bills.


Whats heard is the sounds of bones breaking the crowd stone faced in amazement
but these guys, it dont faze them there surrounded by gore of there own making


ENLIGHTEND...





now both guys are dying.. no one is surviving this violence
the clash and blood bath has passed now the crowd goes silent...



feedback links
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/clash ... ml#p181963
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/clash ... ml#p181964
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/monke ... ml#p181992
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/pinna ... ml#p181955

mVGt Enlightend lol.

Actually pretty entertaining. Ive always been a fan of real"er" writing. The inner lines of "this doesnt rhyme, just taking me to my next place" are a dope tactic. The wording was a little rough on cbks end, but short and sweet, which made lights seem long and exhausted, but as stand alone not bad.

CBK, you were rather short in a lot of ways. Concepts were there but you fell short on execution. Some of the rhymes themselves were stretches, and you should have tried a bit harder to match enlightend structure or flow or style, which ever you decide is better to match. Thats what brings together a successful collab, which im assuming this is. Since you didnt, after reading yours, i felt his were too long, stretched, and had to switch my entire style of reading. Also, i notice your "mutlies", but because they are so simple, they arent going to be as noticed as you'd like them to be.

Enlightend, classic case of outmatching your partner in a collab, which i frown upon. I understand you may be a better writer than him, but to outclass him, isnt your fault, but you should also try and match him, find that good medium in which both of you guys compliment each other. Which in this case is more your job as the veteran writer. Your piece all together was actually very well written.


Good job fellas, dont let my negative feedback make you guys think i didnt like it, thats just the other point of view.

this felt like a horocore battle...so i'ma vote as such

I thought CBK cam really nice here. I liked a lot of his concepts and his structure, i was able to follow his rhyme scheme easier than in the past. He had a lot of "horocre" aspects to his verse and meshed most of his multies in with subtlty.

having said that. i thought Light took CBK a little too light. His verse was less creative, vocab was much more basic, making for a much easier verse to predict. all though LIGHT did clown him a few times, but in a horocore battle, its not neccesarlly dissing as much as it is Grusome imagery....so in terms of a "horocore" feel, CBK got this.

Both had really nice verses, but like i said, i think in terms of a "horocore" battle CBK wins with way better imagry


Vote COMEbACK KID

thanks quix snd alvin... put some more feed on this

is this a battle?


either way I was feeling the whole thing pretty much
just seemed like you were just playing around with this one
the flow for both were cool but different, some lines stood out
others didn't over all a pretty smooth transition for the piece
nice drop my duuuuuuudes