Hip Hop Forum

My impression of lifes like looking in water.. I see a broken reflection
Hopeless perceptions of life ripple my mind causing strokes of depression
Tangled and roped with transgression.. my actions led to misbehaviour
I was one of the kids who bullied the bitch with the glasses and big retainer
A rich disclaimer.. class clown who got yelled at for making jokes in class
I should have focused hard.. but that moment made me into this low life ass
The show wont last.. and I learnt that by failing school with no education
Growing older without opening up.. I was stuck in a rouge vegetation
Problems escalating.. persisting and showing no signs of fading away
I had no way of escape.. getting sucked into crime in a unchangeable way
I needed to break away.. but the grip of money was firmly held tight
I didn’t realise I was a product of my own destruction with a shelf life
So the time came when shit went off.. friends and brothers buried by the gun
Life was numb.. made me cold hearted so I knew my time would come
Couldn’t bite my tongue.. chain reactions occur and I sure didn’t have armour
Cus what goes around comes around.. and I sure didn’t know about karma

Need to do chorus and next verse.. what ya'll think so far??

I think this is weel done, but it seems to skip spots in your life. That being said, when you would get to a third/fourth verse, you would probably become kind of repetative with your lyrics. I would say fill the gaps of your timeline some. Flow-wise, this is very good, and you handle your multi's and your imagery very well. Maybe throw in some more metaphor type bars, or some wordplay to give the reader a little more to think about than just the words that are being said. Just a thought bro. Keep writing!