Hip Hop Forum

im a bhudist monk with intention on enlightening the few
no im not ima younger hitler with an intent on fucking killing a jew
world peace is the answer there no need for wars nor violence
fuck that cut there throat that will make things "peaceful" and silent
wait i have Sunday school and to the lord i'm in-twined
that's a fucking waste lets just watch some fucking adventure time
no u don't control me i wont let u make me your damn pet
without me you're that same nerd who couldn't get his dick wet
i don't give a damn go away i cant take it i despise you
bitch quit your fighting i'm the one who defines you
no u don't i can be normal u nothing but fiction
be normal? you r a fucking walking contradiction
y cant i get rid of you how do u persevere
because i'm not a whiny bitch who hides behind tears
omg its happening i cant stop god help me


to be continued.....i stopped cuz i felt i rushed thru this and didnt do a goodjob honest feedback no hate i cant be mad about negative comments

Liking the concept..split personality...beginning was harddd but at the end you started slipping..as you know by rushing!! still...stick with the concept..i wanna see a full verse!!!!

I didn't really like this...I did....but I didn't it seemed off
and as you said it does seem like you rushed through the whole thing
which really didn't sit well with me...the concept is cool and all that but it just seemed to rushed
either way atleast you had a good flow for a small portion of this
nice job regardless...keep writing