Hip Hop Forum

Proverb wrote:3 bars we'll make it a 12 hr due time this is my check

-- Sun Aug 21, 2011 9:53 am --

i wont even use ya name just lyrics

got no logic left to restrain my creative rights ill turn day to night/
these lyrics are food for thought so you better savour every bite/
eh..if you had said something about him "Biting your lyrics" with this flip itd been a lot iller with the word play.

those haters will never waver, their just a mild viral infection/
but my minds more open with flavor, i exploit my contention with inflections/
this second line should be a punchline, these 2 lines just kinda seem like setup lines. flows nice though.
race is just a color, but it doesn't describe the skin/
my layers more thicker then yours, so you gonna have to play twice as hard to win/
was aite closer. nothing really hard hitting but just some rapping. id try to make the lines more battle oriented, and name flips. obviously thats what i do.

BlakeDowns wrote: forget you and ur jokes nerd,see me in person,there'll be cold words
ok proverb,round here you get smoked more than sold herbs
was aite, better rhyme scheme and multis so far then Verbs.

you aint much competition,if im creatin spits,you waitin bitch
we'll talk careers,im disposing Proverbs faster than any athiests or satanists
hm... aite, this is something good to see

this isnt the first time ur losin,whos gonna respect your spit
i win again,so just keep it movin,you know i direct my shit,
prolly weakest line in your verse

http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/prove ... ml#p179632

Proverb wrote:3 bars we'll make it a 12 hr due time this is my check

-- Sun Aug 21, 2011 9:53 am --

i wont even use ya name just lyrics

got no logic left to restrain my creative rights ill turn day to night/
these lyrics are food for thought so you better savour every bite/

Opening line is kind of weak

those haters will never waver, their just a mild viral infection/
but my minds more open with flavor, i exploit my contention with inflections/


This lines was just self hype, No punch aim @ opponent

race is just a color, but it doesn't describe the skin/
my layers more thicker then yours, so you gonna have to play twice as hard to win/

Blake Downs wrote:forget you and ur jokes nerd,see me in person,there'll be cold words
ok proverb,round here you get smoked more than sold herbs

This opening lines were iight

you aint much competition,if im creatin spits,you waitin bitch
we'll talk careers,im disposing Proverbs faster than any athiests or satanists

you aint much competitive is what you mean.... but this was okay

this isnt the first time ur losin,whos gonna respect your spit
i win again,so just keep it movin,you know i direct my shit,

nice closing

http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/prove ... ml#p179632