Hip Hop Forum

Lol this should be interesting.

Tell us your one night stands/fuck buddy stories

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I was drunk as hell, and went home wit a hefty bitch, k? Following me so far? HONEY BADGER DON'T GIVE A SHIT. Aight? So, I got her beached on my bed and pulled the tarp off of'er and commenced to convulsing on top of her in what could, in some countries, be mistaken as the "missionary" position. This went on for roughly fifteen minutes, I had her usin echolocation in that bitch, talkin to her sea sisters from afar and whatnot, when I decided it was time for a bit of bullriding. So, I went out to the garage and threw on my Fork Lift Straps(c), came back and flipped er on over there. I rode the backsplash for bout ten minutes, when, lo and behold, all that hot crown and coke I'd downed, in a futile attempt to turn her into a Gwyneth Paltrow like Shallow Hal hallucination, started sloshin around in my stomach and made me veritably ill. So I said, "Miss, excuse me, I have to go barf." With that being said, I ran to the toilet and handled business. Then I took her home, after I called the crane service to lift her back into the back of my truck. I dunno, I guess the moral of this story is, if you ride the waves of a jello ocean, prepare to get seasick, especially if you're drunk as a mofucka just lookin to bust a nut.

Hahahahahaha first of all props on the confidence monu! Secondly fuckin great story!! LOL

Sum1 try n top that shit! Lol

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MonuMental wrote:HONEY BADGER DON'T GIVE A SHIT.

^^^ LMFAO

GREAT STORY...

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So I'm at a party in our apt. complex way back when, and this hot ass puerto rican (I mean, fuuuck), shows up to the party and all the dudes are doggin her..so I'm jus chillin on a couch talkin with my boys and she comes up and is like has anyone seen my bottle of goose, someone straight jacked her shit..well no joke I had a bottle of goose, and some other bottles under my bed for safe keepin (had roommates , had to hide my booze or it'd be gone ha), and bein jus a dumb ass I offered to give her mine, for whatever reason, cuz she was hot I guess..so we go over to my place and I get the bottle from under my bed and she accuses of my stealin her shit jus cuz I had a bottle of goose under my bed..and I was like yo I've been at the party the whole time and this shit aint even cold...so whatevs...we head back to the party...so a couple hrs later, she comes over to me and is like hey my friend and I are gonna go back to my place and post party you down? and I'm drunk as fuck, but this girl was jus SO bangin so I had to go, so Im drivin fuckin drunk to this girl's pad following their car (her friend had some dude drive them back to their place)...so we get to her pad and jus start killin shots..well her friend's boy straight left..so it was me and these 2 girls and the other girl wanted a lift home and I was the only one with a car...so I'm like fuck, I think this might happen...my karma kicks in and I'm like I'll give you a ride (which is like 15 mins away), and I turn to the Puerto Rican girl and say you gonna be up if I come back? and she's like NO..lol..so we're bout to take off and the puerto rican girl says hold up, picks up the phone, gets a taxi for her friend, and pays for the ride back..I stay, we fuck ALL night long with some top 3 fuckin in my life, and I never see her again (damn I wish I would've)...so long story I know..but I had a smokin ass chick call a taxi and then pay for it to pick up her friend so she could fuck me...so all in all...some bitch paid to fuck me..ha

Just saying, I thought the topic was going to be a bit different. Usually someone ends up hurt in these situations.

Lol nice one Eckstasy sounds like it was a good night.

And plex i just got out of a long relationship so i put this post up gor a laugh. Just sumthing new too. But if someone gets hurt by a situation like this, i dont blame them. Ive been there, done that, but hey, cats feel free to post ur heartbreak if u want. Its wateva u want it to be. Good lookin out plex, i feel a bit ignorant now that u hav said that but, trust me it aint like that.

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