Hip Hop Forum

http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/seizi ... ml#p175060
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/the-m ... ml#p175061

Listen to this as well http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIIe5SkM3nA

Lyrics start 0:26

Watch as I drop this audio, like Mario, attack like Articuno,
as I rise from below the await upstate straight and bomb like atomic weight,
I investigate like Inspectah Gadget I underrate as I update, flow rate straight,
my rhymes are written in Britain, as there hittin like crimson,
now listen children, I have risen to imprison victims with my vision,
I'm atomic bomb, with wisdom, its in my system as I glisten like Kingston,
I have skills to give you mad chills thrills, as I drive my automobiles,
I'm a work of art, I'm a flow chart, coming from the heart to make a start,
hands down, back down, get down I’m the best around as I travel downtown,
I'm using proper nouns, just to get a cheeky frown, hold up its CountDown,
I have rage like Johnny Cage watch me engage, are we on the same page?,
I express so that i get success your understress, you can't test or confess,
this is Halloween, as I'm a Mean Machine like Wolverine, this is a movie scene,
i've got a rat-a-tat-tat beat, with a mad matter rapper treat, with skills betta than Ice-T,
I'm quite a hitta, But I ain't a quitta, and neitha a Garry Glitter,
check your PM, I'm hit em' like millenium this is platinum and yes this is my emblem,
you say these lyrics are gay I tell you to obey, as I hit replay, and listen to LL Cool J,

It flows ok but seems to make no sense whatsoever it seems like ur just putting big words together and trying to come off sounding intelligent but its not working..... and i I'm not saying ur not smart but when u write like this it gives that impression.... vocabulary is cool but u gotta use it right.... I would rather read simple words that make a point over good vocabulary that is nonsence any day...

Theme was me just bragging about my self I guess. :/

Lol yeah man the flow is nice but yep, it was everywhere in terms to concepts, try writing more to specific subjects which would define your style better, itz kwl to brag about yourself but even so you must write with intents of keeping the audience intrigued till the end, imo, keep that in mind

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

I'll keep it in mind next time.

The slf hype pieces are coo, but we see alot of that. Take that vocab and those rhymes and mold them into something more--write about something in your mind, or something that really happened to you. Beef up your content with reality or emotional value. Show us what you can really do. Keep droppin.

-- Mon Jun 20, 2011 12:07 pm --

The slf hype pieces are coo, but we see alot of that. Take that vocab and those rhymes and mold them into something more--write about something in your mind, or something that really happened to you. Beef up your content with reality or emotional value. Show us what you can really do. Keep droppin.

Hmmmm... nothing much really goes on round my area but I guess I could write about shit in the world though.

Decent drop ur style is still ill...vocabulary is on just make sure the lookers know Wut ur saying...structure ur bars n be keener..tlk to me also...its cool to hype ur self but it wuz like u were in a mirror just spitting tlk to me or even diss the reader BT no names f u don't wana get called out... nice drop Phil ..wana see more

[ Post made via Android ]

Ok readers read this

This is not aimed at anyone I'm just bragging about my self again lol this again was made a while back, everything you see on here is normally old stuff but there will be the few that are new.

Thanks for the feedback KING.

Complete sacrifice of content for the sake of multies... make some sense broski