Hip Hop Forum

http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/relli ... ml#p174792
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/thee- ... ml#p174793


This is straight from my heart yo... Just broke up wit my girl. Its cliché as fuck but i had to get it out

I sit back downin a six pack, tears fall on my notepad/
The love we once had is now a thing of the past/
Was it right to just give up, after the shit weve been through?/
Or should we try again and lie, pretend and say i love you/

You know me better than anybody could ever know me/
Im sorry for this outcome, i tried to leave you slowly/
But, remember last time we tried to reach agreements?/
We fell back in the trap Of lust, that was enough to beat us/

We know each others secrets, and share each others thoughts/
Reminicin' how you loved to sleep in my boxer shorts/
The way you looked at me was enough to fall asleep/
We fit like a puzzle the way we snuggled for heat/

I feel like this is it for me will anybody match up?/
To you, you were my girl, and nobody could detach us/
You'll always be a part of me, even though i hate it/
The problems we were facing could have probably been debated/

I wish that i could tell you everything up in my dome too/
But i dont wanna know you let alone partly own you/
We brought up wedding rings and everything, talkin big/
Thinkin that this would never end, look, it finally did/

Id give anything up to get that last kiss from you/
Im lost, and dont know what the fuck to do without you/
Questoning my actions tryna figure my faults/
I guess it doesnt matter now, weve reached the final result/

Im a mess, im depressed, you got me fucked in the head!/
I told you everything! And ment every word that i said!/
I fucken HATE YOU! you think that this is how i wanted it?/
A relationship? Shit, we should have never started it!/

You fucken retarted bitch! Oh, watch MY language?/
You hipicrit, YOUR the cause off all of this anguish/
Its funny how things changed from all good to disastrous/
I ripped the valentines day cards up n then i trashed em!/

Im selfish i know, i want you back but i dont!/
Im hopin everything will get better but god knows they wont!/
You got me trapped, feelin like a potential suicide victim/
Your the one and only... my ruined addiction/

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

im usually not feeling this type of drop... but it came out good i think one of your better pieces... u can tell ur heart was in it...

This was nice, not anything lyrical but itz deep, nice concept applied in the end too, with the title

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

-- Sat Jun 18, 2011 7:19 pm --

This was nice, not anything lyrical but itz deep, nice concept applied in the end too, with the title

yeah this was decent concept is easily relateable..started off a lil slow in the first 2 bars-4 lines but it picked up from there ..more emotion than imagery on this but ..rhyme scheme was decent and fairly easy to follow...

not bad man....keep droppin...1

good shit man.... nice concept feel it a lil.. bit
but som ya rhymes @ the end of these lines seems forced..

not too obvious to people tho..
but keep it up.


But, remember last time we tried to reach agreements?/
We fell back in the trap Of lust, that was enough to beat us

Its funny how things changed from all good to disastrous/
I ripped the valentines day cards up n then i trashed em!/

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

This wuz a real drop..I liked it b cuzz its something a lot of pol cn relate to...I feel u cud hv been meener ...can't tell if ur really mad or really sad...but I lliked it gud. Shit

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

thanks man.. well. i JUST broke it off wit her so..
im upset, but happy n lookin forward to the future..
umm.. i dono its hard but if its for the best i can be happy..
this is real tho its not like i played this one out.. i literally
broke up wit her on friday.. mesars right. fuck bitches git money LOL
thnx for the feed all

Fuck the bullshit, this was fucking fire, dude. Fuck a cliche, you made this cause you felt that way, it's a plus if people relate, but fuck em if they don't, this is your blood in words. Dopest bars to me are as follows:

Im a mess, im depressed, you got me fucked in the head!/
I told you everything! And ment every word that i said!/
I fucken HATE YOU! you think that this is how i wanted it?/
A relationship? Shit, we should have never started it!/

You fucken retarted bitch! Oh, watch MY language?/
You hipicrit, YOUR the cause off all of this anguish/
Its funny how things changed from all good to disastrous/
I ripped the valentines day cards up n then i trashed em!/

Im selfish i know, i want you back but i dont!/
Im hopin everything will get better but god knows they wont!/
You got me trapped, feelin like a potential suicide victim/
Your the one and only... my ruined addiction/

I feel that shit entirely. Props on this shit, dude.

checking if my avatar works lol

You had some deep lines in here and a good concept, keep up the good work bro.