A Fathers Choice.....
Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 1:31 am
one of my deepest drops ever...
i sit back in this chair, hands up grabbing my hair
lasting despair sound of the life support i have in my ears
my son in the bed beside me comatose tubes in his chest and iv's
the day Ur mom said she was pregnant i thought how blessed can i be
but now I'm sitting waiting hoping for something too change and
all tho the doctors say Ur brain dead I'm gonna have this conversation
i remember..
when u was born, twins premature but u fought threw
i almost lost you for 4 months i slept at that hospital
during birth Ur mother died, i went numb inside cus among other trials
only one of my kids survived, so am i selfish i want my son alive
but life u where never dealt one, my angel going threw hell cause
when u were born Ur heart and Ur brain wernt fully developed
its been three years of your tears, struggles and pain
i cant understand your hurt, but it feels i suffer the same
u went thru it all unable to talk, walk, or maybe even understand
you played Ur cards but against death never had the upper hand
now the seizures every ten minutes have left you barely living
and i fear ur slipping cus signs of hope ur scarcely giving
so now im presented a choice that no man should ever have
i wish i had my better half im forced to play god here instead of dad
but my decision is distant, asking help but no ones giving me wisdom
crying god listen i need you but now I'm doubting him in existence
no.... i have to face it alone this is a decision i must make on my own
so i told my family that this time i wouldn't be taking him home
and it rained hard for hours as i cried holding my son as he died
and when he finally passed the most extravagant colors filled the sky
and as i walked out the door, looking up was a crowed of 11 or more
these people must not have seen innocence entering heaven before
this was posted by me in late 2006 during a topical tourney and has since been copy written by me... all rights reserved.... so don't bite... it isn't just wrong.... ITS ILLEGAL
i sit back in this chair, hands up grabbing my hair
lasting despair sound of the life support i have in my ears
my son in the bed beside me comatose tubes in his chest and iv's
the day Ur mom said she was pregnant i thought how blessed can i be
but now I'm sitting waiting hoping for something too change and
all tho the doctors say Ur brain dead I'm gonna have this conversation
i remember..
when u was born, twins premature but u fought threw
i almost lost you for 4 months i slept at that hospital
during birth Ur mother died, i went numb inside cus among other trials
only one of my kids survived, so am i selfish i want my son alive
but life u where never dealt one, my angel going threw hell cause
when u were born Ur heart and Ur brain wernt fully developed
its been three years of your tears, struggles and pain
i cant understand your hurt, but it feels i suffer the same
u went thru it all unable to talk, walk, or maybe even understand
you played Ur cards but against death never had the upper hand
now the seizures every ten minutes have left you barely living
and i fear ur slipping cus signs of hope ur scarcely giving
so now im presented a choice that no man should ever have
i wish i had my better half im forced to play god here instead of dad
but my decision is distant, asking help but no ones giving me wisdom
crying god listen i need you but now I'm doubting him in existence
no.... i have to face it alone this is a decision i must make on my own
so i told my family that this time i wouldn't be taking him home
and it rained hard for hours as i cried holding my son as he died
and when he finally passed the most extravagant colors filled the sky
and as i walked out the door, looking up was a crowed of 11 or more
these people must not have seen innocence entering heaven before
this was posted by me in late 2006 during a topical tourney and has since been copy written by me... all rights reserved.... so don't bite... it isn't just wrong.... ITS ILLEGAL
