Hip Hop Forum

piles of bars, tears and scars
shows my determination at large,
Charged for assualt and goin to hard,
they said id never reach 21 but im countin the cards,
And im winnin so im rippin the sinnin,
The women i been in and livin the life im beginning,
the rap games tied to my leash so ill never lose it,
tatted muzik notes to my nose so im bein real wen i say i breathe muzik,
I devour rappers all the time so i can say i eat muzik,
punchlines like chloroform so u can say i sleep muzik,
I never use it i just abuse it and fuse it,
After im done with this verse chris brown with the dueces,
but the flow goes and shows im cold like 10 degrees,
so cold  im on fire so i put on like 10 degrees(deodarant),
got my pen and paper to the side of me like 10 degrees,
But my style stay smart it got like 10 degrees.

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

i like the multies in the first bar but the last 4 lines messed me up with the same word ryhming (10 degrees) but overall it was a good drop keep it up

This was a cool piece
looks like your focusing on multi's
which is dope...had a nice flow
short but sweet....keep it up!

Yo man, nice lil piece. Nothing wrong with using the same end rhymes as long as you flip them correctly, which I think you did. Nice coherant flow, as well. Stay up an keep posting.