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hells general.

Posted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:41 pm
by PEPTIDE
yo its the evil demon/
ejaculating hydrochloric semen/
cross between a twisted chieftan and an anarchistic heathen/
do you believe in, my army made of satans spawn/
that crave the dusk and hate the dawn/
armed with swords and sharpened horns/
and move in hoardes, crimson skin with jagged scars/
draped in blackened camoflauge/
screaming as they battle charge/
a sick mirage, i rule them with an iron fist/
demented type of scientist/
fighting in the silent mist/
and i insist,that amageddeon comes around/
cracks the earth and shrouds the cloud/
raise the dead from underground/
i hear a sound, an angel in the mist beckons/
so i pick up a shield and sharpen up my weapon.

Re: hells general.

Posted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:53 pm
by Orfadox
If you want feedback go feed 2 other writtens and post the links in here

[ Post made via Mobile Device ] Image

Re: hells general.

Posted: Fri Jan 21, 2011 8:18 am
by JDR
real short but nice vocab in this piece. Ya avy kind of creeps me out a bit bruh

Re: hells general.

Posted: Fri Jan 21, 2011 2:24 pm
by QwarterZ
your rhymes is what really stuck out to me
got a slick use of words my dude....:shrug:
keep writing brah!

Re: hells general.

Posted: Sat Jan 22, 2011 1:28 am
by Quix
draped in blackened camoflauge/
screaming as they battle charge/
a sick mirage, i rule them with an iron fist/
demented type of scientist/
fighting in the silent mist/


damn ^ this flowed but yes i agree with the others a bit too short hommie!!


NICE DROP THOUGH