Hip Hop Forum

With every breath that I've left behind
I've kept in mind- the lessons I've- been blessed to find.
In the best of my steps I've lept to the sky,
but the rest of my time's confined to the nest.
I've been fresh, I've been tired and depressed,
but the fire in my chest pumps heat into my essence.
I'm restless until I breathe in the message I'm left with.
I've been tested incessant, but my heart beats with the resonance.
This is evidence that I'm destined to be forever on the crest.
I see how to weather winds, so the tempests within will never win.

"In the best of my steps I've lept to the sky,
but the rest of my time's confined to the nest."

^^^ dope lines

A nice drop man, noticed you kept the same rhyme throughout your entire piece, so nice display of rhyming vocabulary.

this was actually a pretty good piece it seemed very poetic..kind of reminds me of the piece I dropped in the Distilled Concepts...a dope piece nonetheless...nice use of vocab...nice switch up when you transitioned your rhymes..a solid piece man...coulda been longer...but eh...u did ur thing...keep it up man

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^^^Cosign...this did seem like a very poetic verse. You should make this longer and tie your verse into the 'tempest' theme in the last bar.

I've been fresh, I've been tired and depressed,
but the fire in my chest pumps heat into my essence.
This is evidence that I'm destined to be forever on the crest.
I see how to weather winds, so the tempests within will never win.
^^^Those lines stood out to me...nice switch in the rhymescheme and good imagery. Made me think of Shakespeare's "Tempest"

Overall, nice verse but it would be nicer if it wasn't so brief. Keep droppin.

Solid use of syllables for a quick key, I.C. I actually was digging the rhyme structure.. even though most think it falls under spoken word, i beg to differ. Had a NAS/RZA feel to it.

poetic shit, nice