Hip Hop Forum

Drawn out by manipulation, convinced the nation to split
raised em from awkward children, now they the lips of hatred
lived as vagrants, picked by agents who stole each kid...
slept on em, flipped the page n skipped over every statement
stated it wasn't for them to consume themselves into society
practiced sobriety, supplied the need for the highest dream
when they tried to speak, they silenced em by buying drinks
colliding quietly, each toe got stepped on, continuing to press on
like a tie, a clip to stress on, till they tried to tug the neck off
fled off into scrutiny, unusually, it isn't what it used to be
the language was fluently engraved, enslaved them from puberty
now they influence each saying, each page n tell them review each speech
each word and recite it in class, till someone said "recite it my ass"
you reside in my past, as a taker, how you going to enlighten my grasp?
when you decide you might have, more knowledge then me? possibly...
or the proba...bility, is beyond the thought I have psychologicly...
my plan was to change the face of the lessons, replace it's intentions
but now they tellin me vacate the premises...for the sake of intelligence
now it all just seems fake, impressionists...tell you anything...
besides the truth, and don't care what the others or many thik...

damn.........

Cool

"continuing to press on
like a tie, a clip to stress on, till they tried to tug the neck off"

Clever

Damn Q, this may be my favorite piece I've read of yours. You got some real almost poetic ways of expressing yourself in this piece, and ur really elevating the topic. You keep on point with the direction of it too, which is nice cuz while a lot of your other stuff runs here and there, this stays on a path and builds from line to line. And as for the flow, it's got some nice multis, include a few reversed multis, which I'm always a fan of. And just in general the flow keeps strong from beginning to end. All in all, this is a dope piece, hope to read more of these real focused writtens from you in the future. This one feels like you spent more focused mental energy on it, and it highlights your writing potential a lot more than some of the other drops I've read recently...

my plan was to change the face of the lessons, replace it's intentions
but now they tellin me vacate the premises...for the sake of intelligence
now it all just seems fake, impressionists...tell you anything...
besides the truth, and don't care what the others or many thik...

This Was Fire Brotha"... Been A Minute Since I Read Some Of Ur Cool Drops... Keep Em Coming.. Good Imagery.. Vocab.. Word Play...All That Good Shit... Holla One1

Aight i see you in this piece , my goodness gracious i was really feeling this. The flow was lovely and they concepts were nothing funny. This piece was that SERIOUS. Be easy.

I like how the flow was all over the place but came together nicely. Lots of imagery and poetic types of feel in this. I also like the line lyrical1 pointed out. That one is well put IMO. Also at the end, besides the truth, I dont care what the others my think or something like that, really put the bottom line at the bottom line haha. Nicely done.


If you have a moment, would you mind throwing some feed on this piece if you haven't already? Thanks.


http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/colle ... 18949.html

Yeah, I felt this shit.. Likin' the flow alot in this piece, I liked your structure and the way you put it together.. Good shit man

The flow and structure in this joint was flawless, excellent use of multies and rhymeschemes, although the subject matter was a lil' bland and insipid in some areas overall this shit was on point, stay droppin.