Hip Hop Forum

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WsICCWQobBg

Imma nomad with no mom n no dad
I hope that hope jabs and brings home back
Imma throw back what those lack with dope raps
That close traps and ropes hacks that hate Tack** (old name)
Revered the times when the fam was near
Been years since i feel the words most hear
A four letter dagger that angers my styles
ta manufacture my fractured ego ta reach
a stature on top of the ladder Wont breath
Till it happens im scrappin like bums ta liven
My own life with strife thats positive
Im inquisitive in the way that i live
So ive grown a bit, fear? in the cabinet
Im fine wit it if its end then i welcome it
this long ive lived and been thru more shit
than most imagine.. i welcome a casket
Fuck it im tired and need some rest kid
But im fully vested in advancing to a nexus
Im restless till my goals is accomplished
This faith i abolish cuz my heart is godless
I get brolic and burn bridges 2 prospects
just to prove points that had no effect
I reject with a reflex the bullshit of weak raps
That spew trash and views lack a real fact
I point that realness is realer then structure
I been under the thunder so i weaken the summer
The clouds of the somber frequent my number
Seekin a figure..that of a father but linger
when neglet is a reson im a fatherless father
why bother when problems is lager than i fathom
a fanthom of a what i was at all angles
my life is a beat and my heart is sample.........

Holy shit, I think this was the best you've done yet.

Perfect flow- I rapped while I was reading just to test it out.

Good vocabulary- keep that shit up.

Heart felt and emotion- no fake stuff, all real... Keep it up.

On topic the whole time.

Better multis and metaphors then I've seen from you, but still could use a little practice and improvement. Not to say that yours weren't good, cause they were. It's just a field I would suggest you work on.

Would sound great on audio- make this a track!

8.9/10

i wish i had this beat...imma ask messia for it...
Thanks for the feed back catch..

yeah i got the beat too ya mayne

yeah this was nice the lines were shorter than i thought but it flowed well had a nice consistent flow scheme

I reject with a reflex the bullshit of weak raps
That spew trash and views lack a real fact
I point that realness is realer then structure
I been under the thunder so i weaken the summer
The clouds of the somber frequent my number
Seekin a figure..that of a father but linger

dope dude dope this was a very good read and i look forward to hearin the track

So ive grown a bit, fear? in the cabinet
Im fine wit it if its end then i welcome it
this long ive lived and been thru more shit
than most imagine.. i welcome a casket
Fuck it im tired and need some rest kid
But im fully vested in advancing to a nexus

I'm diggin' this shit!!!!!!!!!!!!

your really elevating fast dude
I sense a deafshady repeat..........for the lulz
either way I'm diggin' this
flow's nice with the beat can't wait to read it

..

you aint hear...im three people...Im Flip ..Qwarterzone and deaf shadys cousin LULZ

if that were true it would really fuck with my head

fuck with your head.................for the lulz