Hip Hop Forum

A rhythm savage, I spit a verse and cause damage
Known to ravish, an emcee like rabbits an cabbage
Criminal tactics, mixed an intertwined into my status
Got bad habits, smoking drinking and poppin em tablets
Cant stay straight, I’m the guy your parents ll hate
A Terrible fate, has got me insane in a medical state
An Several say, that I’m heading for the federal gates
A miserable place, livin rugged where rest of u stay
my mentalities ruff, knockin emcees as i casually bust
your falicies stuck, with you even as policies rupt
i'm oviously fucked, and will probally stay that way
but fade away, would do unjustice to my day to day
i sway and spray, any emcee who takes me lightly
i may be whitey, but iller than most who sprayin hyphie
envade tha night scene, like drugs lights and alcohol
my mouth has solved, any problem where the fowl's envolve
with proud resolve, i'm a juggernaunt in a shroud of cloth
i'm loud an frothed, mixed inside a boilin cloud of broth
i'll shake you off, like how a quake breaks the soft
mentals taking off, as i save the lost wit flagrent thoughts

pretty good, some of it though seemed to be a little forced, but all in all good job.

"my mentalities ruff, knockin emcees as i casually bust
your falicies stuck, with you even as policies rupt
i'm oviously fucked, and will probally stay that way
but fade away, would do unjustice to my day to day "

nice lol.
I like the images you bring to this piece. Good structure.
Some does feel a bit forced. But good nonetheless man.

thanks for the feed still uppin

Damn it.....Def stole my quote LoL
either way this was a dope piece I like this one
this one just seemed more intuitive
I'm diggin' it keep writing!

it flowed well Defiance. Nothing sparked my attention, but it had nice flow.