Hip Hop Forum

yo i freestyle dis on a mic den went back and wrote it down and revised a lil its still a work in progress i wana about triple the length and get da flow together wat u guys think so far...

FUCK DMC//

I'll take ya whole crew down young smith-n-wessum...
and roll up on dese fags wit da smith-n-wesson//

he slips-wen-testin, and I aint started real beef-yet...
hes seen-best on utube freestylen to his pre-text//

dis just a prefix, no you aint seen da goons-ta-come...
cuz you da gangsta on myspace wit all ya google-guns//

this is fueled-fun, to da so called naptowns-best...
but ya kids are violentJ cuz diss'll be fat-clown-sex//

so how ya bash-down-flex, like you said in dat one-rhyme...
and said you wouldn't sign, when he asked you dat one-time//

HAHA lets get real HAHA

O wesssum ya text-so-fly an ya da best-on-lines...
so can i get a ticket to ya next concert on XBOX-live//

o wess-wont-lie, so he must be a real thug, must have a real gun...
must have da best drugs, so he must make a fuckin ton//

NOPE
so he facen da crim of spreadin dese lies...
of riden in a caddy while he in da skwl bus line//

and now its lunch time and Im-eatin-dis-maggot...
and call me jeffrey dahmer cuz im-eatin-dese-faggots//

*young smith and wessum are the leaders.... he freestyles on youtube to prewrittins his myspace is covered wit all these guns from google his bitch is fat and wheres alot of make up he said he turned down a deal wit funk master flex he did a concert on xbox live he says he never lies he still rides da skwl bus and jeffery dahmers ate fags lol....

i know so much about him cuz im from da same city and hes all hyped up

Damn smith must of pissed you off huh?

they were talkin shit on a track about my lil bro i take care of and im not haven dat

How many of them are there?

and you have this shyt recorded?

DMC is huge dere are probally close to 200 members and im goin to record it once i got more lines

Don't go getting all shot the fuck up over some lyrics.

dis just a prefix, no you aint seen da goons-ta-come...
cuz you da gangsta on myspace wit all ya google-guns//

when you respond to something that's posted online, and actin tough like you think your doin, that finisher in that line kinda describes you more then them .. even tho i don't know any of em, oor know what it's all about .. don't post stuff like this here, people will not take you serious .. just an honest opinion ..

nice wordplay in your opener, but i cannot relate to it in anyway, so therefore i try to look at it as punchlines ... cause that's really what dissing somebody is .. and i don't think it's all that .. it's kinda basic, average stuff .. but i can see a lot of potential if u switch things up a bit, creativity is what it's all about - especially when ur dissin somebody! everyone can write bars about a guy being a faggot, make it interesting! come up with some themes, metaphores, don't make it so obvious, keep people guessin like what does he mean by sayin that? u get it .. ? soo hope you find some sense in this ..

thanks for all the feed ima start dis up again once i get time

Fuck D.M.C!