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2nd try @ multi verse, dope shit

Posted: Wed May 13, 2009 6:58 am
by ugly
these vocabs describe intellectual scriptures, wit a pencil im sinister
every second delivers, rips paper opponents wit scissors in a perimeter
I eliminate my foes Upon-contact, and ur own fan base will applaud-that
all ill lyricists fearin-dis Im to nasty to broadcast, Fear? I cause-that
Im spooken children so I hope ur drawls-last, ur lucky Im drawn-last
as soon as my claws grab, that throat you'll pause fast, and choke
cuz like canibus it ends in the second, its tragic as u fail in seconds
ur da stan sendin me messages, reckless-kid, as for ur history I wont mention-it
you hold no heart like a breathless-spit cuz whack shit is wat ur steppin with
cuz my weapons-rips ur teeth dat ur dentists-gets n soon you'll be headless-bitch
each of your bars are stretched, and them lines are looped
the victor of dis match just guess, as you get K.O bruised

-- Wed May 13, 2009 7:03 am --

LINK: http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/recog ... ml#p115976

Re: 2nd try @ multi verse, dope shit

Posted: Wed May 13, 2009 7:58 am
by ÐÛÇ£»
Im spooken children so I hope ur drawls-last, ur lucky Im drawn-last


Dope...LoL

And Thanks for putting a voting link...

But yeah...flow was kinda confusing at places..but I Caught on..
pretty nice.. i liked it..some of the multis seemed shaky
then I re-read... it..and i enjoyed it
overall pretty cool read.. liked the multis...nice piece..

hope to see you drop again son

Re: 2nd try @ multi verse, dope shit

Posted: Wed May 13, 2009 10:03 am
by JonTheJournalist
nice piece man. Like the previous reply, i seemed lost at times, but with a re-read it made sense.
I like the wordplay and the multi ryhmes.
I always find it difficult to logically put together word play and multis.
nice ish...

Re: 2nd try @ multi verse, dope shit

Posted: Fri May 15, 2009 12:40 pm
by ugly
luv the feed

uppin

Re: 2nd try @ multi verse, dope shit

Posted: Fri May 15, 2009 1:42 pm
by ~Symbolikull~
this shit was pretty nice man... i enjoyed readin it, it made sense the first time but i had to re read a few spots to make the sense of the flow. had some ill lines wit wordplay and multies. some multies got forced but that'll happen ina verse like this. i call those continuers hahaha somethin to use jus to keep movin. so its kool

all ill lyricists fearin-dis Im to nasty to broadcast, Fear? I cause-that
Im spooken children so I hope ur drawls-last, ur lucky Im drawn-last
as soon as my claws grab, that throat you'll pause fast, and choke
cuz like canibus it ends in the second, its tragic as u fail in seconds

Re: 2nd try @ multi verse, dope shit

Posted: Sat May 16, 2009 11:29 am
by ugly
thanks mane

(no need for feed)