Hip Hop Forum

http://www.www.illestlyrics.com/copyrig ... 71ecbf1c5/

had to do this shyt lol

Lyrics:

Hook
that barcardi last night was completely vodka u shud taste it
we was runnin around random an completely faceless
i dont why i was high but i aint complainin
lets go get baked eat a cake that got them thangs in (yeah)
i love my life


Verse 1
see i can relax chill back with my pizza box
u trapped so baddly padded like u've got on locks
well see i get respect ridin with my homies
dodgin the phonies givin orders to my chronies
i'm gonna spice this up u could call it boloni
see i sit straight n i jus wait for it to arrive
this thing is hate fillin up my plate so in i dive
i'm innocent but i'm an immogrant to militant
for u too handle arrested for insolence
i'm filled up with void pilled stuck on ploys
in my hood stood up on choice but i get things done
i dont sit actin dum

Hook

Verse 2
see my life aint that bad so i left to see whats waitin
an as i stride i feel real holy as i'm tempted by satan
come back to the hood ohh i wish u would stop playa hatin
but i aint like that i did fight back look where i'm standin
ohh all the girlsi know sum of em dreamt of me an entry to be
one of the most respected rappers of this centery to see
how it's all played out how god layed it out my theory
is that i dont get famous stuck in the hood ignoranus
never get close to fame nobody knows my name
my flows on game yet i jus get thrown on flames

feed will be returned

Positive

Your Prescense Has Upped A Bit Which Is a Good Sign,
Good To See You Sort Of Steppin Out Your Shell ..


Negative ..

Your Singin Was Weird In My Opinion , It Almost Came Off Decent
But You Fucked Up In Certain Spots And It Sounds Like you Hesitated Way 2 Much. Thru Out Your Verses Also You Could Of Upped You Delivery And Strung Everythin Together Better , You Seemed like You Choked a Bit.

Positive..

You Came Out The Box , Alot OF People Will Spit about The Hood And Guns
( You Tried To Touch Up On The Hood But I Dont Take It Seriously)
On Another Note , You were just Different.. Which is Good... Alot Of People Cant Establish a Name Cause Their Spittin The Shit Everyone Else is , So I Liked That..


The Beat Was Nice .. You Upped Prescense A Bit ..
Changed You Writin Style For The Mic , I Won't Do That.. Thats My Problem..
I Just Wont .. You Could Of Delivered Shit Better .. Try N Find Your Rap Voice.. U Seem Confused .. Again I Like The How You Came Different.. Didnt Like The Singin Somewhat... But To Bring The Constructive Critism To a End , I Give You Props For Tryin , That's All That Matters ..



Keep It Up

ohhh...dammmnnn..i dont know if it's just me but
my speakers are like stortioning out..and the beat sounds..
chopped and screwed or sumthin...i dont know why..

uhh sounds like your doin a 50 centish sound on the hook.
uhhhh..sounds like your tryin to swag up on it...presence
was better then the rest though..swag too..a lil late
on some of the hit words...still i def say it would be
a decent track if the damn thing wasn't full of static..haha..

you still got a ways to go but you def. elevatin..keep doin ya thing..

sorry, but in the first verse, you sound kinda retarded towards the end.. lol adding a touch of irony to the "dont sit actin dum" line... u gotta hot style tho, jus improve your flow and step up the mic presence. i love the hook though, has a nice upper feel....

thanks fo the feed yeah Tre i got that shyt when i tried to play it aswell the proper weird shit distortion in the background i'll see if i can fix it

- Mutual Hostility - wrote:thanks fo the feed yeah Tre i got that shyt when i tried to play it aswell the proper weird shit distortion in the background i'll see if i can fix it

yeah just fix dat shyt technically this is ya best drop so far..

i fixed it pls check it again

man
i hate to be like this
but ur flow killed the whole thing
it was choppy thru out the whole thing
cept the chorus which i personally liked
but i dk what it sounds like
not some one with no experience
but like i dk it was just bad
work on that an du might have it down dood

man u liked the hook at least sum one but me did
the flow was sorta not bothered sorta feel like college for instance lol
but yeah i can take critisism thaanks fo the feed Dead