The Man's Story

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Soulo
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The Man's Story

Post by Soulo »

A man's parting words to the world before his execution for a life of crime was broadcast on national TV live.

It goes...

Narrate my scriptures; honesty can parallel wisdom
Ossified perceptions turn soft like caramel sneakers
Reset the clock like old-timers did back to their prime
Escape the thoughts of whatever's capturing minds
Give it the effort that's perfected by those
Resembles the heaven as shades reflected the globe
Etched into stone; words of a man stay forever great
Techniques once used by masters; this story can relate
living in luxury death can often cross a man's thought
even in glory worries "possess" what a man's got
I fell too Lucifer's playground was my sandbox
underneath shrouds of darkness where hands swapped
chills sent down the spine with the fear for life
as eyes scan out of sight and from rear to side
wealth can blind man make you feel impenetrable
but dwell in that lifestyle and history's inevitable
meager food and clothes money had us lose our home
dad was into drugs and pimpin' and that bruised our hopes
derelict streets I was so sick of living like this
could you really grow a rose when all you're given is shit?
Asian descent faced hatred by the hands of racists
father died by peacemakers images I can't erase it
watched my mother beaten by loan-sharks
ever since I've kept my goals sharp, my dome smart
see life's a book to read of apostates who sought novel ways
turn of events framed to be Marvel'd like a comic page
I've been in prison since birth as the roses withered
now when did capital punishments free a sinner?
head full of tetrahydrocannabinol extorting the biz
shot out pistols like an animal didn't know what it meant
every rich I robbed turned up a dead man for his family
what profited turned the rest to a past of my quandaries
was I free by wealth? logic can't provide the reasons
damn, guess history really does repeat it
when black and white all fade to shades of gray
hated the quondam life but couldn't embrace the change
hooked tight on drugs looked like the good life of thugs
said the good die young but the good life was done
a myriad of teardrops can't cure the fact of a mere cause
roots lie in the past now I'm standing on treetops
it lies deep and connected but chains break by weakest links
got me more actin like creatine despite what people think
so peep the morals I don't need an apology
check initials of the first six lines and take heed of me.
Last edited by Soulo on Tue Jul 06, 2010 5:32 am, edited 1 time in total.
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QwarterZ
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Re: The Man's Story

Post by QwarterZ »

Why you biting my work son?

Just kidding this was purdy dope, the lines came nicely and flowed sickly
very nice work on painting a picture my dude, the introduction brought attention
it made me focus on what you was going to say, and what you were going to end on
the ending was decent, I felt like it was coming tho', very cliche in a way
either way this was a dope piece, keep writing
Soulo
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Re: The Man's Story

Post by Soulo »

Sorry for the late reply, and thanks for the feedback.
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RainMan
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Re: The Man's Story

Post by RainMan »

could you really grow a rose when all you're given is shit?
Asian descent faced hatred by the hands of racists
father died by peacemakers images I can't erase it
watched my mother beaten by loan-sharks
ever since I've kept my goals sharp, my dome smart

^That part really stood out for me, I honestly think this is one of the most poetical piece that has been posted here lately good job man.

8\10

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FlipSide
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Re: The Man's Story

Post by FlipSide »

Reset the clock like old-timers did back to their prime
Escape the thoughts of whatever's capturing minds
Got me thinkin there
living in luxury death can often cross a man's thought
even in glory worries "possess" what a man's got
I fell too Lucifer's playground was my sandbox
underneath shrouds of darkness where hands swapped
Very dope
wealth can blind man make you feel impenetrable
but dwell in that lifestyle and history's inevitable
meager food and clothes money had us lose our home
dad was into drugs and pimpin' and that bruised our hopes
This is a sick set of bars right here for real
derelict streets I was so sick of living like this
could you really grow a rose when all you're given is shit?
Word Life dude...
see life's a book to read of apostates who sought novel ways
turn of events framed to be Marvel'd like a comic page
Nice meta
was I free by wealth? logic can't provide the reasons
damn, guess history really does repeat it
U foreshadowed this well
a myriad of teardrops can't cure the fact of a mere cause
roots lie in the past now I'm standing on treetops
Last lines dope

This is some good work right here...most def worth a peep and a mention
BANG BANG!!!! I Shot U Down
̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=(•̪•)=ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿ -
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