My mind replays my memories like silent movies- black and WHITE//
I close my eyes and wonder when lifes true goals were lost from SIGHT//
Tryna pinpoint the time that life took a downward SLOPE//
I sometimes envision suicide- my lifeless corpse hanging from a ROPE//
Then I hear the angel on my shoulder and know that sense is SPOKE//
My mind replays my memories like silent movies- no sound is UTTERED//
I open my ears and try to catch the words as they are MUTTERED//
I imagine they're sweet things, nice things- but are they REALLY//
Or are they evil voices, speaking threats against the ones that I hold DEARLY?//
It's my mind playing warped silent movies- the only one I FEAR IS ME!!
[ Post made via Mobile Device ]
-- Thu May 12, 2011 5:18 pm --
2nd attempt at poetry
Silent movie
Moderators: Loon E Lou, Kuhlerblynd, Glamtrash, Borat
- EcKsTaSy
- Rhyme Master
- Posts: 222
- Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 12:51 pm
- Wins: 7
- Losses: 5
- Location: Cali, great place to visit
Re: Silent movie
deep bro..sounded off the top
- Defiance
- Rap King
- Posts: 946
- Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 3:31 am
- Wins: 10
- Losses: 13
- Location: boise, Idaho
Re: Silent movie
i liked it man, good feeling to poetry man feeling this, good emotion..
neilz the poet..
keep doing your thang you dirty englishman
neilz the poet..
keep doing your thang you dirty englishman
Sound click page
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default ... dID=918703
One of Illestlyrics Best Collaborators 2011
- M33Kish
- Elite Freestyler
- Posts: 465
- Joined: Fri Mar 25, 2011 3:21 am
- Wins: 14
- Losses: 17
- No Shows: 1
- Location: Minniesota
Re: Silent movie
nice peice, its kinda like a mind problem thing though, hearing voices and what not. lol but good drop do more poetry lol
The Meek Shall Prosper... So they say :P
Re: Silent movie
Interesting drop here my fellow poet, as I read this I really liked the 2nd stanza. Overall I feel like there was something missing... not sure if I can pinpoint it... With that nonsense aside haha for this being your second attempt at poetry I would say you are doing well mate! Keep them coming man. After a couple years at it you will be writing shit that will blow peoples minds! Just always write for you and always speak the truth bro...
[ Post made via Mobile Device ]
[ Post made via Mobile Device ]
POET OF THE YEAR 2011
I'm often soft like cotton but my message is clear, my words hold weight like "dumbos" ears.
I'm often soft like cotton but my message is clear, my words hold weight like "dumbos" ears.
- MonuMental
- Hairy Scoundrel
- Posts: 528
- Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2011 9:09 pm
- Location: Leland, MS
Re: Silent movie
Nice movement to this piece. I can relate to the darkness.
[center]Peel back the facade and behold a bold insanity,
With no repose or vanity, composed of inhumanity.[/center]
[center][/center]
[center][/center]
[center][/center]
[center]Illest Awards For 2011:
Text MC of the Year- MonuMental
Class of 2011- MonuMental, Enlightend, 3rd String, CBK, and Pest
Writer of the Year- MonuMental
Written of the Year- MonuMental 'A Series of Unfortunate Events'[/center]
[center]a-series-of-unfortunate-events-vt23866.html[/center]
With no repose or vanity, composed of inhumanity.[/center]
[center][/center]
[center][/center]
[center][/center]
[center]Illest Awards For 2011:
Text MC of the Year- MonuMental
Class of 2011- MonuMental, Enlightend, 3rd String, CBK, and Pest
Writer of the Year- MonuMental
Written of the Year- MonuMental 'A Series of Unfortunate Events'[/center]
[center]a-series-of-unfortunate-events-vt23866.html[/center]
- 32neilz
- Elite Freestyler
- Posts: 379
- Joined: Sat Mar 12, 2011 7:19 pm
- Wins: 11
- Losses: 14
- No Shows: 3
Re: Silent movie
Thanx for the feed guys- it's appreciated
[ Post made via Mobile Device ]
[ Post made via Mobile Device ]
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests