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Silent movie

Posted: Thu May 12, 2011 5:07 pm
by 32neilz
My mind replays my memories like silent movies- black and WHITE//
 I close my eyes and wonder when lifes true goals were lost from SIGHT//
Tryna pinpoint the time that life took a downward SLOPE//
 I sometimes envision suicide- my lifeless corpse hanging from a ROPE//
Then I hear the angel on my shoulder and know that sense is SPOKE//

My mind replays my memories like silent movies- no sound is UTTERED//
I open my ears and try to catch the words as they are MUTTERED//
I imagine they're sweet things, nice things- but are they REALLY//
Or are they evil voices, speaking threats against the ones that I hold DEARLY?//

It's my mind playing warped silent movies- the only one I FEAR IS ME!! 

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-- Thu May 12, 2011 5:18 pm --

2nd attempt at poetry

Re: Silent movie

Posted: Thu May 12, 2011 5:20 pm
by EcKsTaSy
deep bro..sounded off the top

Re: Silent movie

Posted: Fri May 13, 2011 1:55 am
by Defiance
i liked it man, good feeling to poetry man feeling this, good emotion..

neilz the poet..

keep doing your thang you dirty englishman

Re: Silent movie

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 8:22 am
by M33Kish
nice peice, its kinda like a mind problem thing though, hearing voices and what not. lol but good drop do more poetry lol

Re: Silent movie

Posted: Sun May 29, 2011 4:18 pm
by Borat
Interesting drop here my fellow poet, as I read this I really liked the 2nd stanza. Overall I feel like there was something missing... not sure if I can pinpoint it... With that nonsense aside haha for this being your second attempt at poetry I would say you are doing well mate! Keep them coming man. After a couple years at it you will be writing shit that will blow peoples minds! Just always write for you and always speak the truth bro...

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Re: Silent movie

Posted: Mon May 30, 2011 4:10 pm
by MonuMental
Nice movement to this piece. I can relate to the darkness.

Re: Silent movie

Posted: Mon May 30, 2011 4:11 pm
by 32neilz
Thanx for the feed guys- it's appreciated

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