I know, baby

Expand your artistic ability through poetry and story telling. Poetry has been given new life ever since the inception of hip hop. Relax for a minute and explore your poetic side here.

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MohammedT
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I know, baby

Post by MohammedT »

The night was young and full of hope
you planned your news years and grabbed your coat
slowly down a downward slope
your night began to head.

She kissed me wither her eyes closed

She said she loved me all this time
and only words my lips could say was a
cold and curt 'I know'.

stumbling out of a yellow cab
your friend feeling drunk and mad
and on her face she looked as if
she had just been had.

Walking dog like up the stairs
you ran your fingers through her hair
she kissed you with her eyes closed...

and only words your lips said back was a
cold and curt ' i know'.






I can actually see someone singing this.

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Alvin
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Re: I know, baby

Post by Alvin »

I'm not sure what "curt" means or if its a miss spell but its nice man. Rather short but good none the less. I do like it, only thing that throws me off is that word. Is it about two different people though, cuz first she kissed "me", then she kissed "you"?

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MohammedT
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Re: I know, baby

Post by MohammedT »

curt - rudely brief in speech or abrupt in manner.


and thanks for pointing out the mistake in the first line . it should be 'you'.

ha, i realize i made this mistake throughout. hmmm read it either you want, you or me, whichever you prefer. i'll have to decide which one i like best.

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Glamtrash
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Re: I know, baby

Post by Glamtrash »

It's very short and sweet, but it's not terrible. The structure's a little off, along with the adverb mistakes. But i'd like to read more from you.

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MohammedT
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Re: I know, baby

Post by MohammedT »

word uppin. if the structures off it's because i have the rhythm in my head, haha but thers no way i can just explain over the internet how I would recite a poem or sing it

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