3rd String QB vs Deception (1st Round)

2011 Illest Topical Tournament for the belt!

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The Architect
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3rd String QB vs Deception (1st Round)

Post by The Architect » Tue Jul 26, 2011 9:55 am

Rules
7 Bars/14 lines (MAX)
Due 96 hours(4 days) from time of this thread
First to 5 votes (3-0=ko/4-1=tko). Each day late is 1 against you
Voting must use categories with brief explanations.

Categories
-Storytelling
-Flow
-Creativity
-Rhyme scheme
-Metaphors & Similes
-Consistency
-Impact


3rd String QB's topic is "Murder witness"

Deception's topic is "My super power"
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Deception
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Re: 3rd String QB vs Deception (1st Round)

Post by Deception » Wed Jul 27, 2011 8:53 am

Check

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Sir Kevin O Shea
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Re: 3rd String QB vs Deception (1st Round)

Post by Sir Kevin O Shea » Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:38 am

My friend approached me at the store but im always discreet with her
circumspect but not for respect to her fiance because beatings occur
I hoped for a change but the anxiety of loneliness kept her submissive
I reached out to hug her and started having a psychic premonition
she began washing dishes and he entered the door hyped with chaotic energy
yelled how worthless of a woman she was to pile on more stoic misery
fine physically but mentally exausted from being scarred and missing sleep
taken intentionally especially with him hitting her so viciously
usually a few slaps was it, but he threw and kicked her until she grabbed a knife
from the kitchen, she kicked his left knee and stabbed his right
the other remaining slashes made deep gashes penetrating like meteor craters
I flashed out, she kissed my face and said to me we should meet up later
next day I read the scenario, not from a book but instead the news paper
dna evidence said she removed his body using an apartment elevator


*Edited for grammatical errors
Last edited by Sir Kevin O Shea on Fri Jul 29, 2011 6:29 am, edited 3 times in total.
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The Architect
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Re: 3rd String QB vs Deception (1st Round)

Post by The Architect » Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:34 am

this was sad... i was really expecting deception to show since panda suggested

qb wins by no show

-updated and closed-
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