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YungDosia VS ER (YD Wins 5-2)

Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 12:45 pm
by ER215
10 lines
due Wednesday night
cats: Punches, Flow, Personals, word/nameplay, enjoyment

Check

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Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2010 2:13 pm
by YungDosia
...

check.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 1:57 pm
by ER215
Wait until the sun goes down imma make this bitch light up (in my Drake voice) lol... I'm bored..

Ayo check it...

Pay attention cuz I am what hip hop breeds, pull you from your roots and take care of this BabyWeed/
Your style is very "Ehhhh" so I know my rhymes will supersede, cuz I listened to your flow "Ummm yea, I'd rather read."/
You must of came back to illest to steal a few bars, and to find lines better than yours won't be really hard/
I'm lookn for a title but I'll take this lil spar, and when I knock you out ya space at least you'll land upon some stars/
This a win-win for me how dare you contest mines, when your "Vote-quix" reply was by far your best line/ (See Creative VS Quix in Closed Battles)
Imma perfect 10 but I'm makin you face 9s, blastin your rhymes cuz ur shit just waste time/
Wit your Underaged position I'll devour your intentions, Only hot when you get smoked now that's some Non-fiction/
I got this on lock winnings just a repetition, settin flame to some Dosia blowin smoke at competition/
I asked Yung if he had beef the nigga started bitchin, then held up a sign that read "Eat more Chickn"/ 
I'm beyond your comprehesion wit the bars that I can mention, I got that hieroglyphics flow u can't decipher the encryption/   

FIN

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Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 3:10 pm
by YungDosia
ER215 wrote:Is that your check in??

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-- Wed Oct 20, 2010 7:14 pm --

Just let me know if that was ur check so I can get to my verse... Due date is still tonight too... No change ups..

-- Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:19 pm --

I guess that wasn't a check... Hm... *Shrugs shoulders* was looking forward to a good battle...


...Murder

^Stupid fuck i said "check".

See yall wouldve seen this idiot post something stupid if he went first
Cuz he cant even put together the word i was saying....let alone a decent verse
I dont know why this fagget acting tuff, he soft so do i need to mention..
That there's nothing but a bitch in er...like a girl in critical condition
Ill leave the place shook, he a fake rook, wit probly a retarded vinny chase look
Who's so ugly tom kicked him off myspace, and now he cant even face..book
Ive read some ya battles, stretched lines, stretched lines, believe me aight
Cuz your verses almost always leave the page...next we hope u leave the site
You aint knocking out the king nigga, how ya hits hurtin me??
When the last upper cut you ever made.....was on ya wrist vertically


keyed.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 3:40 pm
by Kuhlerblynd
ER's verse

Pay attention cuz I am what hip hop breeds, pull you from your roots and take care of this BabyWeed/
Your style is very "Ehhhh" so I know my rhymes will supersede, cuz I listened to your flow "Ummm yea, I'd rather read."/

Aight, this wasnt hard hitting to me at all. If it was in a face to face battle, MAYBE, but as an opener of a text battle, nothing stood out to me.

You must of came back to illest to steal a few bars, and to find lines better than yours won't be really hard/
I'm lookn for a title but I'll take this lil spar, and when I knock you out ya space at least you'll land upon some stars/

I like the wordplay but its not amazing. The delivery couldve been better. The set up was cool, except Ive never heard of him biting or 'stealing a few bars' so it doesnt really hit to me. Personals are only personal if they are TRUTH, and Im not directing that to you as much as other peeps on this site.

This a win-win for me how dare you contest mines, when your "Vote-quix" reply was by far your best line/ (See Creative VS Quix in Closed Battles)
Imma perfect 10 but I'm makin you face 9s, blastin your rhymes cuz ur shit just waste time/

Now, this is a nice fucking bar, even though theres a 'played out' gun play reference. Your multi isnt on point though, and your flow is seeming stretched now cuz the lines are so long.

Wit your Underaged position I'll devour your intentions, Only hot when you get smoked now that's some Non-fiction/
I got this on lock winnings just a repetition, settin flame to some Dosia blowin smoke at competition/

This was a cool little concept too, but the delivery didnt connect as well as it could have IMO.

I asked Yung if he had beef the nigga started bitchin, then held up a sign that read "Eat more Chickn"/
I'm beyond your comprehesion wit the bars that I can mention, I got that hieroglyphics flow u can't decipher the encryption/

Im not gonna lie, I laughed my dick off at that first line. Shit was funny. A solid closer, no doubt about it.

YoungDosia's verse

See yall wouldve seen this idiot post something stupid if he went first
Cuz he cant even put together the word i was saying....let alone a decent verse

Seeing how he did post first, that beginning line doesnt hit... And theres no punch there at all. Wheres the joke? Fam, you're just saying something, not really putting him under the bus at all...

I dont know why this fagget acting tuff, he soft so do i need to mention..
That there's nothing but a bitch in er...like a girl in critical condition

This is more my speed on things. Nice play on his name, even though its an obvious one, just because of the delivery. Oh, and your flow is much cleaner to recognize than his is.

Ill leave the place shook, he a fake rook, wit probly a retarded vinny chase look
Who's so ugly tom kicked him off myspace, and now he cant even face..book

Man, are these references played. I do like the approach and delivery with this though. Its a different way of putting a bar together, but its works.

Ive read some ya battles, stretched lines, stretched lines, believe me aight
Cuz your verses almost always leave the page...next we hope u leave the site

The way you repeated in the first line (not sure if it was on purpose) but it made me laugh. The punch isnt there at all tho.

You aint knocking out the king nigga, how ya hits hurtin me??
When the last upper cut you ever made.....was on ya wrist vertically
I like the wordplay and punchline in this one, even if someone would say 'its univeral' cuz when you dont have any personal shit to rip on someone with, WTF else are you supposed to come up with?

My vote goes to Dosia, but only by a hair. Honestly, ER I think you came alot better in our battle. Just seems like you missed on a couple punches by a hair with the delivery, and that couldve won this battle for you.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 4:14 pm
by Momeijah
Well this was weird. ER u have a pretty unorthodox style and Dosia did u half ass this or have u always written like that ?

Anyway the punchlines were pretty weak in this. ER had one personal that I seen and Dosia had them scattered about his verse, so yeah that's what won it for me. ER had some clever shit that could've been setup or delivered better and Dosia had a more simple but effective structure, it was just a more straightforward battle verse.

Vote - Dosia.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:12 pm
by IntrinsicCadence
Flow: ER (ER's verse was much more fluid, rhymes felt more natural, Dosia's felt too forced to me. Neither really utilized multis too well, there were a few, but they were rather weak ones.)

Punches: ER (The punches were not the best I've seen from ER, but there were a few that stood out above anything Dosia had. I liked the I'd rather read line quite a lot. Dosia had some punches in there, but nothing stood out too much. I think Dosia was actually more consistent, since ER had some solid punches and some shit that missed everything, but consistently not quite enough.

Personals: Dosia (Dosia's whole verse was personal, which is good, but as mentioned above would have benefited from more of a punch behind the personals. ER's verse had some nice nameplay, which is part of a personal shot, but not really anything truly personal. So for this category definitely goes to Dosia.)

Overall: ER
I'd say this was quite a close battle, but I think ER's verse had more creative punches and a much better flow. With just a bit more creativity in the punches there I think Dosia could have taken this one.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Sat Oct 23, 2010 12:36 am
by TheNobleOne
i believe dosia had some punches but was lacking in the set-ups. dude could have flipped his lines way better to make them sting. the verse was just lackin in that hard hittin punch. i think your ending bar was your best one and even that one could have been set up better. the bitch in the ER line was alright but again, just pretty plain. "leave the site" line had me laughing.

ER like other dude said some of your lines would be good for face to face battles but not a text battle, thats what ive been trying to tell you. you seem to have been working on that but still throw one of them in your verse here and there. try to refrain from that and just go at your opponent with punches and wordplay. i was diggin that Quix line you had in there. you had some wordplay spread out through your verse so that was showin creativity for sure.

i give the edge to ER

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 9:59 pm
by ER215
Ok it's been 3 days and no votes... Is is safe to up this??

I've spammed the shout box and all.... If not let me know and I'll delete this or a mod can...

2-2

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 3:22 pm
by drunken jesus
vote - dosia he was by far more direct and insulting which is what counts in a battle er was a bit simple and his approach was less effective & none of his lines really stood out imo dosia didn't have any knockout punches but he had a few pretty good lines

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 3:11 pm
by YungDosia
bump

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Fri Oct 29, 2010 8:21 am
by JDR
ha nice to see you back dosia

Vote - Dosia. Thought his verse was pretty basic but it fit the bill well in this battle. Seen you come a lot harder ER. Obviously Dosia didn't try very hard but most of his disses were comical and on point.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Mon Nov 01, 2010 11:50 am
by YungDosia
4-2 bump.

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Mon Nov 01, 2010 1:01 pm
by precise
ER your punches werent put together well enough, n the set ups werent quite sufficient, dosia, your verse was direct but had plenty of fillers

im not sure if breaking it down into your cats is really necessary

overall, i think id vote dosia

Re: YungDosia VS ER

Posted: Mon Nov 01, 2010 1:03 pm
by Kuhlerblynd
Dosia wins 5-2

Records updated and thread closed.