Shadow

Release your best recorded material and let the world hear your talent. It doesn't matter what level you are on - you will get constructive feedback to increase your skills.

Moderator: Loon E Lou

Forum rules
Embed your soundclick video players with [soundclick]Song Id[/soundclick]. You can also just put [soundclick]Embed Code[/soundclick].

Please go back and fix as many of your old songs as you want.
Post Reply
User avatar
Seanny T
Dedicated Emcee
Posts: 97
Joined: Mon Feb 28, 2011 10:53 am
Losses: 3
Location: Alberta, Canada

Shadow

Post by Seanny T »

Here's the last song on my Futuristic Ideology Mixtape, coming Jan. 21st! Check it out, gimme as much feedback as possible. And I know my mic sucks so besides that lol. I wanna know what u think lyrically, flow, emotion, etc. The songs about me being adopted, and how i feel about it, and is directed mostly at my real parents.
Attachments
Seanny T- Shadow.mp3
(5.96 MiB) Downloaded 165 times
Melt ice with my glare, freeze water with my stare

User avatar
AntiMaTTer
Army Of Three
Posts: 716
Joined: Tue Aug 31, 2010 11:52 am
Wins: 16
Losses: 1
Contact:

Re: Shadow

Post by AntiMaTTer »

yea sounds like your mics clipping. try turning the mic gain down bit, they say to shoot for -12 db. idk. this solid track, if you can get pass some minor quality issues its a good track, im diggin it sir. good job stay grindin. im expecting some more enjoyable tracks.
as far as elevation parts, im still new to audio so idk much but just sounds like some of the flow was choppy but didnt hurt the track too much.
Image

IL record:
16-1

User avatar
TreTru
Rap Professional
Posts: 1606
Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2008 5:35 am
Wins: 9
Losses: 5

Re: Shadow

Post by TreTru »

Aight this goes deep..yeah first verse that Flo is mostly on..
you might wanna sound a lil more dynamic tho.Its a deep subject
so i see ya trying to go with emotion but try to sound a lil more confident...Imo
Ya Flo slides off a lil in the 2nd and 3rd verse..but you bring it back...
I think the concept is a good one to go with a laid back approach but you might wanna redo the Vere's.imo..line up ya flo a lil more....im juss trying to help

But you got mad potential so keep doin tracks bro...

Practice makes perfect!!

User avatar
Lawgix
The Aphilliated Assasin
Posts: 4214
Joined: Thu Sep 21, 2006 3:25 pm
Wins: 14
Losses: 8

Re: Shadow

Post by Lawgix »

listening.... the flow is okay.... nothing really to flip over.... deep topic.... hooks phenomenal... yeah i think you need some work man... delivery, mic presence, it all just sounds too forced... relax... tell a story... don't just read words on the paper... don't like the sudden stops that u do... its a good attempt tho man keep up the work man... thats a hell of an ending.... iuno to me that kinda ruined it... IMO...

give this a 4/10 cuz of the ending lol...
Don't Let The Game Make U, Make Urself

Lawgix

Illest Radio

Image

"Sometimes You Gotta Stand By Your Failures To Recognize Your Success" Joe Budden

pest wrote:You look Easy... Whats Good?
AntiMaTTer wrote:lmao ...is this how you hit on all the chicks?

User avatar
Deciple
Elite Freestyler
Posts: 464
Joined: Sun Jun 21, 2009 2:13 pm

Re: Shadow

Post by Deciple »

First off the beat is real, smooth and deep, the hook is amazing, way diggin that.. now to the verses, the lyrics are real and hit a sensitive spot, but has you heard it sounds like your reading it from the paper, try to memorize it and lay it down as if your real parents were right there in the booth with you.. this track (minus the quality) is a good track.. imma be looking for more from you now.
Image
Philippians 4:13
I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Psalms 23:4
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

User avatar
Shooter
Dedicated Emcee
Posts: 97
Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:04 am
Wins: 2
Losses: 2

Re: Shadow

Post by Shooter »

I liked it it was real deep and of course I liked the hook the only bad think is the mic like you stated
But otherwise it was good

Keep up the good work

[ Post made via iPhone ] Image

User avatar
2xS
Elite Freestyler
Posts: 272
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 4:03 am
Wins: 2
Location: Minot AFB
Contact:

Re: Shadow

Post by 2xS »

Your mic sucks :) Lol. But anyways, I feel like your topic deserved more emotion on it, you brought a darkness to it, and it matched the beat, but I feel like you could've put more pain in your voice, especially how you began describing your feelings in the 2nd verse. Watch your delivery as well, you're forcing lines by trying to fit too many syllables/running out of breath. One thing that helps is punch-ins. Use them. If you don't know what they are, message me before Wednesday, and I will give you a quick tutorial on the proper way to do them. I think you should also cut that outro from the final version of the track...kind of ruins it lol. Decent listen though, just improve what was said.
. . .If It Ain't Audio, Don't Ask Me To Vote. . .
http://www.reverbnation.com/2xsdoubles

User avatar
Seanny T
Dedicated Emcee
Posts: 97
Joined: Mon Feb 28, 2011 10:53 am
Losses: 3
Location: Alberta, Canada

Re: Shadow

Post by Seanny T »

Thanks all of you, and yes my mics the biggest piece of shit ever, but I'm trying to pull some strings and actually get studio time for cheap. And yea idk y I put that thing on the end lol I just did but it won't be there on the finished mixtape so don't worry. I'll upload the mixtape here Jan 21st, and I would really love feedback o it as a whole to. If ppl dissect the songs each in detail that would also help me improve. And 2xS what are punch ins? I'm kinda new to this. Only been goin on making my own stuff for about half a year now.

[ Post made via iPhone ] Image

-- Tue Jan 03, 2012 1:15 am --

Thanks all of you, and yes my mics the biggest piece of shit ever, but I'm trying to pull some strings and actually get studio time for cheap. And yea idk y I put that thing on the end lol I just did but it won't be there on the finished mixtape so don't worry. I'll upload the mixtape here Jan 21st, and I would really love feedback o it as a whole to. If ppl dissect the songs each in detail that would also help me improve. And 2xS what are punch ins? I'm kinda new to this. Only been goin on making my own stuff for about half a year now.
Melt ice with my glare, freeze water with my stare

Post Reply

Return to “The Booth”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests